All the transfer gossip sites are full of rumours that Gabriel Heinze is about to join West Ham. I can think of 57 reasons why this might not be true, but if it is, then I guess we should all be welcoming it. I have to admit I don’t know much about him. So your mission, dear Reader, should you wish to accept it, is to give me 57 reasons (well, ten will do) why this is a good idea. Heinze or Shorey? Your call.