My West Ham: Roy Young

February 17, 2009

I got am email over the weekend from a reader, Roy Young, who had just been reading Brian Belton’s book, BLACK HAMMERS. I thought I’d share it with you.

I am 44 now and West Ham has been a major part of my life it’s also proudly on my birth certificate as I was born in Forest Gate Hospital in December 1964 and instead of now being known as the borough of Newham back then as you will now it was the borough of West Ham !! (sounds much better) !!

I am the first son of an English women (June) and a Jamaican father (Roy) who came direct from Kingston Jamaica has a ‘stowaway’ so his first port of call was Brixton Prison he was also a professional boxer.

We grew up in Bow and my first recollection of Upton Park was going with my dad aged around 3 / 4 so around the ’67/’68 season, my brother had to wait and instead settle for going to Roman Rd market with mum 🙂

I will always remember those days and the magic feeling I had being in Upton Park with all the claret & blue !! I do remember snidy racist remarks but always felt safe with my dad ‘the boxer from the tough streets of Kingston Jamaica 🙂 Of course for obvious reasons my hero was Clyde Best they were all my heros but here was this man who had to put up with abuse just because he happened to be black and he never showed it bothered him at all indeed he rose above it that taught me a lot !

When my brother reached an appropriate age we included him in on the fortnightly journey from Bow Rd to Upton park ! So now there were 2 brown kids with big afros alongside our ‘minder’ and dad !! We were a rarity indeed I never recall seeing other people of colour at Upton Park them days apart from Clyde and Ade !!

So we were regulars at Upton Park from ’67 to ’74 when unfortunately my mum had to run away with us due to the violent nature of my father we ended up in Bristol via various women’s aid refuges or as they were called back then battered wives homes.

On subsequent visits I have had to endure racism one time in particular stands out to me whereby I got in late for some match and somehow found myself in front of thousands of fans doing the monkey chant I just remember smiling !! They will never ever put me off of supporting my club !!

I remember us watching the ’75 cup final in Bristol with our claret & blue uniforms on !! We were also both top footballers and are well known throughout Bristol as the 2 ‘Ammers Roy and Barry !! We have remained passionate about West Ham and has you rightly say it’s something your born West Ham I cannot explain why this West Ham burns so bright in my soul but it’s lovely !!

Roy has promised to update his story from 1975 to the present.


My West Ham: Matthew George

April 19, 2008

Matthew George is Political Editor of the Western Daily Press.

How did you become a Hammer?
I was brought up in a London overspill town where tens thousands of people were relocated, including many Hammers fans from the East End, and I supported them as most of the people around me did. The other main team was Millwall, so I had a lucky escape there.

How many games do you get to?
Season ticket holder in East Upper, so almost all home games and then I usually go to the London away games, and a few longer trips as well, such as Everton and Bolton this season.

Most memorable moment?
So many to choose from. Just from the last 5 years, I’ll never forget being at Birmingham when we got relegated for the wrong reasons, along with losing the play-off final to Palace. The win over Preston was probably the best moment, and then the Cup semi-final win over Middlesbrough and most of the final, and also being at Old Trafford for the last part of the Great Escape last season.

Have you met any Hammers players?
I did spend a day at training at Chadwell Heath when Alan Pardew was the manager, and met some of the players, but I spent most of the time with the staff, including Roger Cross, Kevin Keen and the legendary Ludo, who claims not to be from that near Moscow after all. Christian Dailly was the friendliest of the players, and Repka had the most impressive car, a gullwing DeLorean-style monster. No wonder he got upset when people scratched it.

Favourite current player?
Mark Noble, as he is a fan who really wants to the play for the team, and has that mix of skill and commitment that Hammers fans always want.

Describe last season. How did it affect you?
I went to the Bolton 4-0 defeat that cost Pardew his job, and thought we were certain to go down because we seemed completely demoralised. But after playing better against Spurs, despite losing, then the lucky win at Blackburn, and the 1-0 win at the New Library when Arsenal had about 30 chances, I started to think we might escape, and we did have a world-class striker in Tevez. I am still annoyed that the most extraordinary escape for relegation in decades was overshadowed by the nonsense Wigan and Sheffield were talking over the Tevez situation. It’s all gone quiet over there now.

What are your hopes for this season?
In the last few games I would like to see Curbs give starts to Sears, and more chances for Collison and Tomkins; as long as we stay in 10th, and above Spurs, we might as well plan for the future.

Choose your all time Hammers Eleven
In an attacking 3-5-2 formation and not including the World Cup winners as I did not see them play live

Miklosko
Dicks, Martin, Rio,
Bonds, Brooking, Devonshire, Cole (Joe, not Carlton or Mitchell), Noble
Di Canio, Cottee

Subs: Green, Potts, Carrick, Cross, Tevez.

What do your colleagues make of your support for West Ham>
The ones who don’t support West Ham are all glory-hunters and part-timers – who cares what they think?

When you’re reporting on West Ham games how difficult is it to be objective?
I’ve never had to, fortunately – I don’t think I could.

Complete this sentence: The thing I hate about West Ham is…
That racist song about Spurs

Complete this sentence: The thing I love about West Ham is…
Everything else


My West Ham: Pete May

March 11, 2008

Pete May is the author of IRONS IN THE SOUL, HAMMERS IN THE HEART and was a regular contributor to the fanzine FORTUNES ALWAYS HIDING. His new book THERE’S A HIPPO IN MY CISTERN (Collins) is out on June 2

How did you become a Hammer?
My dad and I toured around various London clubs when I became interested in the beautiful game, age 11. We tried Arsenal, Spurs and Chelsea. There was a brief flirtation with Manchester United because of George Best, but West Ham was the closest team to Upminster station and seemed somehow special. Must have been all those lab coats and high-leg DM boots on the North Bank that did it.

Your first game?

It was West Ham v Blackpool on October 31 1970. We won 2-1 and John McDowell was making his debut. We’d just shifted Martin Peters to Spurs and acquired some old drunk called Greavesie in exchange, although even when an alcoholic he still scored more than Carlton and Luis up front. Back then the band played on the pitch before the game and Hammer used words like ‘custodian’, ‘axiom’ and ‘kudos’.

How many games do you get to?

I’m a season ticket holder in the East Stand and I’ve been to Coventry and Arsenal away this season. Would have been away more but for book writing commitments.

Most memorable moment?

So many. Di Canio’s histrionics in the 5-4 home win against Bradford take some beating. I was at the 1975 FA Cup final and in 1980 I travelled down from Lancaster University and managed to get a ticket for a fiver from a fellow fan to see us beat Arsenal at Wembley. The play-off final against Preston was unforgettable because we’d sold half the England team and somehow returned to the Premiership. Also the 2004 play-off semi-final against Ipswich, Tevez diving into the crowd against Spurs and when we beat Chelsea 1-0 with Di Canio’s goal linger as examples of just how emotive games at Upton Park can be. The 2005 FA Cup Final felt like we are a part of history in the making and I felt immensely proud that our team had helped salvage the reputation of the FA Cup, even if defeat was horrible. I won’t forget losing away to Rotherham or a 6-0 defeat on plastic at rainswept Oldham either.

Have you met any Hammers players?

Yes, I interviewed Paolo Di Canio and he was very keen to talk about Mussolini ­ which makes him quite left wing in Chigwell. ‘¹ve also interviewed Alan Pardew, Glenn Roeder, Harry Redknapp at Sportspages (who claimed not to recognise Leicester Square) and Curbs when he was at Charlton.

Favourite current player?
Robert Green, I guess, although there are no real heroes now Christian Dailly and his curly hair have gone. Bellamy might be entertaining if he’s ever fit, but we desperately need a Di Canio/Tevez-esque figure.

Describe last season. How did it affect you?

I’ve never felt lower than after the Spurs defeat. My six-year-old daughter Nell had to chide me for saying we’d lose before the Blackburn game and she was right. What followed was one of the greatest feats of escapology ever yet we got no credit for it, such was the media obsession with Tevez-gate. Being at Old Trafford was brilliant. I’ve never known tension like it.

What are your hopes for this season?

To finish tenth and get a striker who can score!

Choose your all time Hammers Eleven

Parkes
Bonds Moore (Captain) Martin, S Pearce
Di Canio, Brooking, Peters, Devonshire
Tevez Hurst
Subs: Green, Dicks, J Cole, McAvennie, B. Robson.

Tough to leave Dicksy out but I feel that Stuart Pearce was much better at controlling his aggression. The side lacks a midfield ball winner but you can’t really leave Dev, Trev or Martin Peters out. Bilic would also be close to making the subs bench as would Cottee.

What do your colleagues make of your support for West Ham

There seem to be numerous Hammers fans in the media. Lasagne-quaffing Spurs fans are the worse for taunting.

When you’re reporting on West Ham games how difficult is it to be objective?

Impossible. I could never be a full-time match reporter because it would mean missing watching the Irons.

Complete this sentence: The thing I hate about West Ham is:

Our complete and utter unpredictability.

Complete this sentence: The thing I love about West Ham is:
When I’m Forever Blowing Bubbles is echoing around Upton Park and Wembley. There’s no better football song in the world.


My West Ham: Daniel Schweimler

February 21, 2008

Daniel Schweimler is the BBC’s South America correspondent, based in Buenos Aires, Argentina.
How did you become a Hammer?
The first game I ever went to was West Ham v Burnley in the old First Division sometime in the mid-sixties. My dad, a chef, had a rare Saturday off and took me on the back of his scooter. We lost. We then moved out of London and I grew up supporting Aldershot in the old Third Division. But in my early twenties moved to Forest Gate and a job as a reporter on the Ilford Recorder – back in Hammers territory!

Your first game?
See above

How many games do you get to?
Now, none. I’ve lived the past two years in Buenos Aires where I’m the BBC South America correspondent. I see a fair few on tele – less now that Tevez has gone. When I was living in London I worked shifts so usually get to seven or eight home games and one or two away games a season.

Most memorable moment?
I was in Cardiff for the play-off final against Preston…but the following day walking up Green Street with my kids and seeing the open-topped bus was probably my happiest and most memorable moment.

Have you met any Hammers players?
My wife finished third in a charity running race in Victoria Park and Steve Lomas presented the trophies and signed our football for us.

Favourite current player?
Matty Etherington

Describe last season. How did it affect you?
Traumatic! The good side was that living in Argentina, the drama and Carlos Tevez’s involvement in it put West Ham on the map here. Walking the streets of Buenos Aires with my West Ham shirt on, people would shout ‘Wist Jam’ and put their thumbs up to me. It was big news on the sports pages and nearly every painful, frustrating minute was shown on cable TV. I travel a fair bit and got to see us letting in goals in Uruguay, Bolivia, Peru and Ecuador. I was observing penguins on Martillo Island near Ushuaia the day we beat Man U at Upton Park. Martillo means hammer in Spanish!! And my boys (Ben 10 and Lucas 8) and I provoked complaints from the neighbours with the noise we made when Carlitos put the winner in at Old Trafford. We were in London last February and went to that West Ham v Watford (league) couldn’t, mustn’t lose game. As the final whistle blew I looked over and saw my youngest son in tears.

What are your hopes for this season?
I guess we have to be comfortable with mid-table mediocrity. Not sure the nerves could stand another season like the last one and hopefully an improvement next year.

Choose your all time Hammers Eleven:
Ludo in goal. Billy Bonds, Bobby Moore, Lampard (senior), Julian Dicks at the back, Joe Cole, Michael Carrick and Yossi Benayoun in midfield, Paolo Di Canio, Carlos Tevez and Geoff Hurst up front.

What do your colleagues make of your support for West Ham?

Football is the main talking point in Argentina so there’s always interest. Back in London we are a small but elite few.

When you’re reporting on West Ham games how difficult is it to be objective?
I don’t report on them so football is one of the few aspects of life I don’t have to be objective about.

Complete this sentence: The thing I hate about West Ham is…
The lack, often, of any kind of killer, will to win instinct. How many times have we played well and lost? Or been two up with half an hour to go and lost or drawn? It forces you to be philosophical about football and about life.

Complete this sentence: The thing I love about West Ham is…
The apparent lack of any kind of killer, will to win instinct. It’s the game that counts, not just the winning. How many times have we played well and lost? Or been two up with half an hour to go and lost or drawn? It forces you to be philosophical about football and about life.


My West Ham: Brian Belton

February 13, 2008

Brian Belton is the author of several best selling books about West Ham.
How did you become a Hammer?
I guess everyone sees this differently, but for me supporting West Ham is something you are born to rather than ‘become’. As a baby my mum sat with me in our yard in Sampson Street, E13 on a spring Saturdays and sang ‘Bubbles’ to me along with the crowd that could easily be heard from where we were. She tells me that when there was a big cheer for a home goal that I’d bounce up and down in my pram and cheer as well. My dad was a goalkeeper in the West Ham Boys side that was coached by Ernie Gregory. Who else was I going to support? Like so many other supporters I ‘am’ West Ham (and West Ham is me). West Ham till I die? West Ham from the moment I was born! But I have good friends who were born from Bangladesh to Trinidad, from Hong Kong to the Falkland Islands whose footballing affinities lie with the inextricable Irons. However, my argument (which they broadly agree with) is that they born to it too. You see there are dozens of East Ends; they exist all over the world. I have a long term pal who was born in the South African East London. His first football shirt put Irons over his heart and there they have stayed (although Orlando Pirates play a surrogate role). Perhaps it is something about being ‘on the edge’, or feeling akin to those who continually punch above their weight or identify with the striving to make something potentially mundane beautiful and exciting. West Ham supporters arise organically but their share a particular ‘soul-nature’ (you can recognize it because it’s claret and blue).

Your first game?
I was taken to my first game at Upton Park by my cousin, Steve, and a few of his mates. I was not really supposed to be in the ground being in my fourth year and my ‘carers’, well, were more than twice my age. However, the dad of one of Steve’s pals worked on the turnstiles and got us in about an hour before the game. We were squeezed up on the ‘shelf’ of the North Bank for the initial Upton Park game in West Ham’s first Division One match for more than 36 years. It was 25 August 1958 and the Wolves of Wolverhampton were the old gold clad visitors.

The first thing that hit me was the shear colour of it all – the turf, the strips and the crowd. I knew the players faces and could recite the West Ham side that had beaten Middlesbrough in the last game of the Hammers promotion season without fault and recall getting on Steve’s nerves as every time a West Ham player received or won the ball I shouted out his name.

It was close to half-time when I yelled ‘Musgrove’ as he picked up the ball on my right (West Ham were playing towards us in the first half). He seemed to run like lightning before sending a perfectly weighted pass to Vic Keeble (‘Keeble!’ I hollered). I can still see him look up for a split second that has lasted the better part of 50 years. His cross blasted into the middle of Wolves goal mouth below us. I found myself shouting ‘Dick’ as the tall Scotsman dodged a challenge before, about 20 feet from the goal-line, in a flash, cracking the ball with a satisfying ‘Tump!’ into the back of the Wanderers net. Unfortunately I don’t recall seeing John Smith’s goal.

How many games do you get to?
I’ve never been a season ticket holder. It feels like joining something and I’m not a great joiner of things. But it also goes against the spirit that first took me to Upton Park; I’d be obliged to sit in the same seat every time I go to a game and as someone who has always gone to football to watch the crowd as much as the game that was never going to suit me. Family, friends and friends of friends loan me their tickets when they can’t make it or I buy in advance (this is usually when my kid and wife come with me). I often find myself sitting with visitors when I cadge on a Gooner or one of my associates who is a Spurs fan. At away games it is not unusual for me to be found sitting with the home crowd. It is relatively easy to get into games at Bolton and Wigan for example. I like talking and listening to different people at matches, it gives me sort of cross sectional view of why people support and keeps me in touch with how people feel about things.

Most memorable moment?
I’ve been present at every final West Ham have made since 1964 and I suppose I should say one of those. The Cup Winners Cup final in 1976 was a great game. Like many of the Irons’ finest moments it was a defeat, but we did it fabulously. But my most memorable moment was something a long way away from that match in time and status.

I used to go to reserve games at West Ham’s Upton Park ground. They don’t do that anymore, the pitch is saved, in the main, for first team games. I started attending reserve games when I was about five or six. My four or five mates and me would play for the Hammers against Spurs, Arsenal or, for some reason I can’t recall, Estudeantes de la Plata in the FA Cup final in Castle Street, E13, waiting for gates to the North Bank to be opened at half-time allowing us to ‘flood’ into the near deserted edifice. The North Bank stood where the Centenary Stand now overlooks the Iron’s sacred turf and from its forsaken, yawning entrails we’d watch snatches of the game between mimicking first-team match days, crushing up together behind a single barrier, shouting warnings like, ‘stop bumming me’ and loudly questioning, ‘who’s pissed in my pocket?’ whilst imploring the claret and blue second string to, ‘Coom-yon-uuu-Iiiiionnnnzzz!!!’. Other distractions from viewing West Ham’s twilight regiment of future and past being pulverised (memory’s a bitch) included games of ‘he’ and standing directly in front of lone pensioners. We would look at these old boys in counterfeit shock as they pelted us with a comfortably predictable deluge of verbal filth. We would also mime ‘crowd riots’ (a challenge for such a small group with a collective age of 35) or line-up one behind the other and ‘do pushers’, sending all of us tumbling down the stand like over-coated dominoes. Another favourite pastime was congering up and down the near uninhabited concrete chanting, to the tune of the Seven Dwarves classic, ‘Hi-Ho!’; Mile End, Mile End, Mile End, Mile End, Mile End…(such performances could go on for an near twenty minutes and occasionally more than an hour). This was the mantra of the ‘Mile End Mob’, a collection of youth gangs that would meet at Mile End underground station to become West Ham’s travelling buccaneer army of the 1960s. The ‘Mob’ was made up of the young tribes of weekday rivals from Stepney, Canning Town, Whitechapel, Dagenham, Hornchurch and all the ‘villages’ North of the River, East of the Tower, an area still then pock-marked by the ravages of the blitz and continuing poverty. Come the next first-team game, this conglomerated ‘crew’ would crush together onto the North Bank to renew their collective allegiance to the mighty Hammers. One day we would join their ranks and carouse around the urban wastelands of England celebrating being ‘us’. But on that winter’s evening, as the flood-lights of the Boleyn Ground broke through the icy mist that shrouded London’s docklands, maybe 500 dawns into the ‘swinging’ decade of the last century, we were far too young to be part of that. Our ambitions were set on becoming ‘Snipers’, the under-13 (more or less) cadet core of the ‘Mile End’. It was just after singing and swaying to the Sniper hymn, Snniiiipuzzz! Snniiipuzzz! that I got knocked unconscious.

In time with our homage my little choir pointed towards what was then the enclosure where visiting supporters would be directed, the despised South Bank (that would eventually metamorphose into the Bobby Moore Stand). The South Bank would be transformed into the ‘home end’ in a rather lame effort to break the cult of the ‘Mile End’ and control match day trouble. The tactic was to mark the end of the MEM, but it gave rise to its more malevolent successor, The Intercity Firm.
Our ‘Sniperian’ sonnet had been going some moments when the ball was murdered by the chest of West Ham’s Johnny Byrne. The stained sphere fell, seemingly as slow as a leaf, to receive a mighty belt from the Byrne right boot. The shot screamed towards the goal, but with the lightest kiss atop the away side’s bar, the oscillating orb cannoned on…straight towards…me. I don’t know how, when or why I decided that I wound head the ball back at Byrne, but spreading both arms wide, I pushed my compatriots aside and flung myself towards the on-coming missile. I saw it spinning in the air, turning like some mad banshee, it screamed its coming and I knew I would make contact; I would meet this challenge and connect with my team. I would be totally Hammered! The last thing I remember before leather met cranium was marvelling that so much turn could be applied at such great force; then the lights went out, at least in my diminutive, infantile nut anyway. In the expanse of my childish unconscious I had a little dream wherein Percy Dalton (the peanut man) was arguing with the West Ham manager Ron Greenwood about the state of the buses, Ron was calling in Yogi Bear to arbitrate, him being smarter than the average bear, when illumination was restored. I awoke looking into the face of Johnny Byrne. Like, England international, most expensive footballer ever, Johnny f****** Byrne! ‘You okay sonny?’ he asked looking concerned. My modest firm were standing round in awe, little Colin Jones, the amazing two foot Trinidadian, smallest giant in the East End, was mutely holding out a crumpled piece of paper and a blue, betting office pencil. Byrne had jumped out of the fantasy realm of the pitch into the stark reality of the North Bank; he had crossed the divide of dreams and run up the terraces to where I lay. ‘Yeah’ I said, trying to pretend that my flight down twenty feet of terraced hardness had been deliberate. I was planning saying something like, I do that all the time John when he remarked, ‘Good header’ and gave a little chuckle as he helped me to my feet. ‘Thanks’ I replied with all the nonchalance I could muster. He signed Tony’s scrap of putrid papyrus and trotted back down to where the other players were, quite rightly, looking up at him from the other side of reality. That autograph would be with Colin forty years on. He carried it into eternity in the top pocket of the suit he wore as he was cremated in little Catholic chapel in New York after a long battle with an evil illness.
My first conversation with Johnny Byrne would not be the last, but our next chat would be separated by the tumult of my teenage years and John’s combustive reign in world football. But we never really parted. As I followed him and his West Ham, we were all Hammers. Incited by Bobby Moore, our coming was felt like the distant thunder of Zulu army jogging, inextricably, across the veldt. At the best of times, just when the opposition thought it had heard the last of the Irons, the portentous presence of Moore would coagulate in the middle of the park and the buzz of swiftness around the ball would start, eliding out space and enveloping it, Byrne, Hurst, Boyce, Sissons, Brabrook would dazzle, dizzy and confuse to weave the Hammers back into contention. Sophisticated in assault out of defence, passing along the ground with intoxicating accuracy, rarely did the ball take flight; darting runs carried it to rock the enemy like lightening bolts from the claret and blue. A collusion of deft passing and on-the-ball skill was their only authority. That West Ham side had the ability to generate an idyll of football. Never had so much soccer anticipation been stirred to be so thoroughly sated. I wrote Budgie’s biography a few years ago (Burn Budgie Byrne). For me he was one of the most talented players that ever graced the claret and blue.

Have you met any Hammers players?
I think it is more than a hundred now. From the earliest days of the club’s existence players would coach in local schools after training in the afternoon. My school was just a few minutes walk from the Boleyn Ground and Clyde would take that stroll to coach us on Southern Road playing field, now the home of Newham United. So he was one of the first I met. He worked alongside another Hammers pro, George Andrews. Clyde would coach on the run, playing alongside us, constantly chattering tips and instructions. George would stand on the sidelines. Clyde’s quiet Barbadian tones were not at all foreign to us, my school boasted dozens of ethnicities, but we had no experience of ‘deep Caledonia’ culture. This being the case, the only thing we could understand from Scots George was his screamed Highland war cry “Will Ye Nay Stoop Shooootin’!”

Later, drinking in the Black Lion in Plaistow I bumped into Bobby Moore and John Charles. I had met Bob many times as he and quite a few other players (Harry Cripps, Malcolm Allison and Noel Cantwell) used to buy shirts from my father’s stall in Queens Road Market when I was very small (dad bought high quality shirts and sold them at a very small profit, but made more money on the ties and cuff-links that went with them). He would now and then come round to our house with the likes of Danny Blanchflower and Ken McKinley (the West Ham speedway captain). Ken would purchase a couple of dozen shirts to sell at Custom House stadium. As a young teenage I’d very occasionally see Bob at the Ilford Palais and a few years on I often saw him at the Room at The Top (also in Ilford). He’d always say hello and when I was with a girl would chat and buy us a drink – nothing to do with the girl of course.

I met fifty of the players from the 1950s when I wrote Days of Iron (which was an honor and an education) and of course, over five years working alongside John Charles, I met quite a few former players. But Black Hammers led me to interview the likes of Bobby Barnes, Anton Ferdinand, Marc-Vivien Foe and Shaka Hislop.

Favourite current player?
I like Mark Noble, but I’m not alone there am I? He is a fine player, but what I like about him most is that he personifies what West Ham is about. He’s a Hammer through and through; born in Canning Town and coming up through the youth sides. If the day comes when we end up like Manchester United, Chelsea and Portsmouth having half the side made up of players from one particular team (in their cases West Ham) it might be time to start restricting myself to attending Academy games. Once a Hammer always a Hammer; Tevez, Cole, Carrick, Rio even Lamps, no matter how much their current clubs might boast about them as ‘their’ players, in the background, tapping on the back door of their consciousness, there will always be the nagging knowledge, ‘they are Hamsters!’

Describe last season. How did it affect you?
I loved it! Every minute. I loved Carlos and everything he did. I loved that we made him Hammer of the Year. I loved how Curbs led us home. I loved watching Mr Bean moan in harmony with Kevin McCabe (Sharpe went blunt) and most of all I loved watching Dave Whelan being all northern and outraged. Well worth £5.5m. The worse thing was old Yoda saying he was going to fight all the way and then fell on his knees to plead guilty to a charge that some alleged could not have been made to stick. That story is of course still to be fully told.

What are your hopes for this season?
Old Russian saying – ‘hope is the last thing to die’ – I hope we can finish above Portsmouth and Tottenham. I hope we qualify for Europe. I hope people will start to appreciate Alan Curbishley a bit more and remember we stayed up under his leadership and how that run in last season was truly magnificent – given our situation it must rate as one of the best performances ever by a West Ham team.

Choose your all time Hammers Eleven
Always a difficult one; you gonna pick the players you love or the best players (not necessarily the same thing). Also, are you going to look to the likes of Len Goulden, Ernie Gregory, Ted Hufton, Vic Watson, Sid Puddefoot and Danny Shea, the great players of the pre-war period? I’ll go for my best XI from the last 30 years, just to keep it a bit straightforward:

Phil Parkes, Ray Stewart, Julian Dicks, Billy Bonds, Alvin Martin, Alan Devonshire, Ian Bishop, Frank McAvennie, Carlos Tevez, , Trevor Brooking, Tony Cottee

I might have included Paulo Di Canio, maybe instead of Cottee or McAvennie, but the Nazi salutes of late don’t seem in the best interests of the game – Controversial selection – Ian Bishop. But ask the players who see him as one of the most talented Hammers ever.

What do your colleagues make of your support for West Ham
I work in higher education and as a person with a passion about identity in sport am probably am a bit of an oddity in this sphere. As such folk mostly ignore my connection with West Ham (although it is hard not to know about it I guess). I try not to sing ‘Bubbles’ at degree ceremonies in Canterbury Cathedral and this is probably appreciated. I think Football is still seen as something essentially masculine, although my mum is the greatest supporter of West Ham in my family and given the strides in the women’s game internationally, but also amongst young women from working class background in the East End and like areas across Britain, I’m not sure this is much more than an out-of-date prejudice. There has also been some wonderful work done recently on the history and social impact of women’s football; to name but a few; A Game for Rough Girls: The History of Women’s Football in Britain – Jean Williams , Boots and Laces: An Insight into Women’s Football in England – Maysun Butros, The Dick Kerr’s Ladies – Barbara Jacobs, Offside?: The Position of Women in Football (Behind the Headlines): The Position of Women in Football (Behind the Headlines) – John Williams and Donna Woodhouse , Out of Bounds: Women, Sport and Sexuality – Helen Lenskyj, A Beautiful Game: International Perspectives on Women’s Football – Jean Williams, I Lost My Heart to the Belles: Story of the Doncaster Belles – Pete Davies, The Game and the Glory: An Autobiography – Michelle Akers, The Girls of Summer: The U.S. Women’s Soccer Team and How It Changed the World – Jere Longman and the new book about Hope Powell, Dream to Win.

Complete this sentence: The thing I hate about West Ham is…I don’t hate anything. Some things are hard to take sometimes; the increasing commercialization of the game (although that has always been there) but perhaps more than that the lack of local players coming though, especially from our local Asian community that has some wonderfully gifted players. I saw one little bloke playing in the street (a rare enough thing these days) not 5 minutes from the ground; he looked like Jimmy Johnstone on the ball. As a youth worker in East London over the last 30 years I have seen hundreds like him; why hasn’t at least one of these kids come through?

Complete this sentence: The thing I love about West Ham is…
That they are mine.


My West Ham: Ian King

February 6, 2008

Ian King is City Editor of The Sun.
How did you become a Hammer?Confession, first – the truth of the matter is that my home town team is Bristol City. That’s where I’m from, it’s the team my dad supported and it’s the team I grew up supporting. And I still do. However, my career took me to London, making it very hard to see the City regularly. Being a regular football watcher – more than 450 matches and rising – I had to get a regular fix. The Hammers were the London club I’d liked the most as a kid and so, on coming to London, were the team I made a beeline to watch in those early days – nearly 20 years ago. It’s grown from there. The Hammers represent everything that is good and pure about the game and the fans are superb.

Your first game?2-0 away at Southampton in 1984.

How many games do you get to?Season ticket holder, so most home matches. Went to every home match last season but have missed a couple this year.

Most memorable moment?Probably the 2005 play-off final. And Paolo di Canio’s volleyed goal at home to Wimbledon in 1999-2000 was the best goal…although I got very excited by Jermain Defoe’s winner at Old Trafford in 2000-01 (which was overshadowed by the FA Cup win up there later that season)

Have you met any Hammers players?
Yes, I interviewed Sir Geoff Hurst in 1999 when I was working at the Mail on Sunday, in connection with a business venture he had at the time. And I met Sir Trevor Brooking in the corporate hospitality area at the England v Sweden match in Cologne in the 2006 World Cup. And Harry Redknapp when he came into The Sun’s offices in 2000. All he wanted to do was talk about what shares he should be buying, though, and how Davor Suker had talked John Moncur into some iffy investments.

Favourite current player?
For their sheer commitment, it’s hard to see past either George McCartney or Hayden Mullins this season.

Describe last season. How did it affect you?
Despondency, hope and then, ultimately, exhileration. Must admit I thought it was all over that grim afternoon when Fulham got an equaliser to make it 3-3 in the sixth minute of injury time. It was certainly a roller-coaster. Tevez was an absolute hero although hat-tips should also go to Mullins, Neill and Robert Green for their efforts also. My partner was very disappointed though – I’d promised her that I’d give up my season ticket and spend more time with the family if the Hammers went down.

What are your hopes for this season?
Mid-table stability and none of last season’s nerve-shredding.

Choose your all time Hammers Eleven
This is based only on the players I have actually seen physically in action (hence no Moore, Hurst or Brooking, unfortunately):
Ludek Miklosko; Ray Stewart; Stuart Pearce; Alvin Martin; Rio Ferdinand; Alan Devonshire; Joe Cole; Mark Noble; Frank McAvennie; Paolo di Canio; Carlos Tevez. On the bench: Robert Green; Lucas Neill; Igor Stimac (a much under-rated player); Michael Carrick (ditto) and Tony Cottee. Manager would be Alan Curbishley with Tomas Repka as motivational trainer (but certainly not driver of the team bus) and Sir Trevor Brooking in there in some capacity. His record as a caretaker manager is Champions League material.

What do your colleagues make of your support for West Ham?Many of them are West Ham fans themselves and so they welcome it. The rest just ask me what I will do if Bristol City are promoted to the Premiership next season.

When you’re reporting on West Ham games how difficult is it to be objective?I pride myself on my objectivity.

Complete this sentence: The thing I hate about West Ham is…… the anti-semitism of a minority of supporters at Tottenham matches.

Complete this sentence: The thing I love about West Ham is…… the Boleyn Ground when it’s jumping


My West Ham: Con Coughlin

February 3, 2008

Con Coughlin and I share a page in the Daily Telegraph every other Friday. He’s the Foreign Editor.
How did you become a Hammer?It’s in my blood. I come from a long line of East Enders (I was born in Stepney) who supported West Ham. My granny went out with a West Ham player (name unknown) in the 1920s and my Dad, who was a football writer for the Sunday Telegraph, grew up with them. Harry Redknapp is my Aunt Pat’s cousin.

Your first game? Must have been about 1963. Mr Dad (Con snr) often used to take me to the old press box at Upton Park when he was covering matches, and I think I first went about 1963 (when I was 8) but I can’t remember who we played. I just remember all the players’ names began with “b” – Boyce, Bond, Brabrook etc..But I do remember us beating Preston North End 3-2 in the 1964 cup final.

How many games do you get to?
As I travel so much for work I don’t get to as many as I’d like. I had a season ticket two years ago, but missed so many matches I gave it up. Nowadays probably get to half a dozen a season. Last saw us lose to Everton in the League Cup – aaaggghhh!! Watch all the live games on telly.

Most memorable moment?
When West Ham won the World Cup in 1966 – and, yes, I was there. My Dad knew the copper running security at Wembley, and slipped him a fiver so we could get in. I was 11, and I had a plank of wood on a camping stool so I could see the game (we were standing on the terrace). Every time a goal was scored, the crowd surged forward and I was knocked off my little stool, which I then had to reconstruct. I spent more time putting this contraption together than watching the game. But I do remember Hurst sprinting off to score the fourth goal, and as we came out of Wembley I clearly remember the Evening News front page headline – “West Ham win the World Cup.” I’ve still got my World Cup Willie rosette!!

Have you met any Hammers players?
I used to know a few through Dad. We moved out to Upminister, and Dad knew quite a few of the players who lived in the neighbourhood through work and playing golf. Jimmy Greaves was a close family friend and my brother and myself once went on a boating holiday with Jim and his two boys, Danny and Andrew, on the Norfolk Broads. Whenever we tied up people would come up and say, “You’re Jimmy Greaves”, and he would get all embarrassed and say, no, he just looked like him. He was in his prime at Spurs then and was such a lovely, funny guy. I remember Greavesy coming round to us in 1966 after the Uruguay game and showed us the big hole that had been kicked out of his leg, which made him miss the final. He was in tears over it. Dad also knew Bobby Ferguson, the goalie, who became a close family friend. He still keeps in touch with my Mum from Australia, where he moved after he finished playing. As a student I used to work in the King’s Head pub in Hornchurch which was the haunt of many of the players from the mid-1970s – Pat Holland, Tommy Taylor, John McDowell – etc..and I used to serve them their half a lager and limes at Sunday lunchtime – priceless!

Favourite current player?
Mark Noble. Not only has he got the talent, he’s got the attitude – the Billy Bonds tackle with the Trevor Brooking class.

Describe last season. How did it affect you?
For a lifelong hammer, totally predictable. I was in Cardiff for the Cup Final where we totally outplayed Liverpool and deserved to win. Then a few months later we are playing like a pub team. Typical. But that’s why we love them.

What are your hopes for this season?It would be nice to finish in the top six, but with the injuries we’ve got I think we’d be lucky to get eighth. I’d just like to see what kind of team Curbs would put out if he had everyone fit.

Choose your all time Hammers Eleven
Parkes, Dicks, Moore, Martin, Lampard (snr) Brooking, Bonds, Devonshire, Peters, Greaves, Hurst – reserves: Green, McDowell, Paddon, Cottee, Di Canio

What do your colleagues make of your support for West Ham
I think they’d like me to talk about something more interesting – like how to win the war on terror or who’s going to win the American presidential election.

When you’re reporting on West Ham games how difficult is it to be objective?
Impossible. I remember going with my Dad when I was a teenager and sitting in the press box when we stuffed Chelsea 3-0 – I was jumping up at every goal and getting some very cross looks from the likes of Brian Glanville.

Complete this sentence: The thing I hate about West Ham is…
…they fade and die – Liverpool in the cup final, Everton this season in the League Cup – it’s now 28 years of hurt!

Complete this sentence: The thing I love about West Ham is…
…they rise so high – when the crowd gets behind them and they go for it, there’s no better place in the world than Upton Park.


My West Ham: Matthew Lorenzo

January 15, 2008

Matthew Lorenzo is a presenter on Sky Sports.

How did you become a Hammer?
Inherited. My father was born around the corner from the ground and he passed it on. I’ve done the same to my son but he struggles a bit seeing as we live in Putney and everyone else supports Chelsea or Fulham.

Your first game?
Can’t remember a specific match but I was taken to Upton Park regularly from a very early age. It would have been in the mid sixties. My dad was a reporter for the Sketch or the Herald. He didn’t bother with passes. He made a point of knowing the commissionaire’s names. AND their wife’s names. Doesn’t work any more. Sadly.

How many games do you get to?
Only in midweek unfortunately. Sky takes up my weekends. I’ve never hidden my favouritism on air though. How can you be interested in football and claim not to have a team like a few commentators I know try and get away with? Despite remaining ardently neutral about West Ham in everything I do, I got reported as a bloody QPR supporter last week.

Most memorable moment?

The FA Cup semi final replay against Everton at Elland Road in 1980. Probably a wee bit biased but I can’t remember ever being as excited by a game of football in my life. Ed “Stewpot” Stewart, an Evertonian by birth, was sitting behind us. After the game I turned and asked him for an autograph for my sister. I could see he’d rather give me a head butt but he did the deed.

Have you met any Hammers players?
One of the first I met was a new signing from Charlton. We were at the training ground and he signed my book. He went on to become one our greatest ever signings, although for the first two years of his reign I thought he was called Billy Bones because his signature was next to illegible. I worked on the Walthamstow Guardian for five years so I got to meet a lot of the team from the early eighties. Alvin Martin was the easiest to talk to then and remains the same today. My father was great mates with Bobby Moore and hero worshipped him. I still look forward to seeing Geoff and Martin today.

Favourite current player?
I like Mark Noble because he ‘s a local lad and was always a Hammers fan. Not many of them nowadays and not many who combine his talent and appetite for the game.

Describe last season. How did it affect you?
The worst part was being accused of cheating. Neil Warnock described Tevez as the football equivalent of a murderer out on parole or something like that. You can understand it but at the same time it was unfair. Our form at the end of the season was fantastic. I went to Old Trafford with Eamonn Holmes, a Man Utd fanatic and my fitness trainer. We deserved to win that one and we deserved to stay up. I don’t know why it had to be such a last gasp experience, but like all fans, we are only ever kept in the dark while the money men move in their mysterious ways.

What are your hopes for this season?
Mid table. Well all right not relegated. Be nice to win the Cup after Gerard stole it from us in Cardiff.

Choose your all time Hammers Eleven
Phil Parkes
Ray Stewart
Frank Lampard
Alvin Martin
Bobby Moore
Billy Bonds
Trevor Brooking
Alan Devonshire
Geoff Hurst
Bryan Robson
Martin Peters

What do your colleagues make of your support for West Ham?
No one feels threatened by West Ham. We still play attractive football, we still don’t win enough games. We still have the best support in London. And fortune’s will always be bleedin hiding.


My West Ham: Martin Kelner

January 13, 2008

Martin Kelner is a journalist, author and radio presenter.
How did you become a Hammer?
Long story. Grew up in Manchester watching rugby league. My dad was a fanatic, and our local team, Swinton, was about the best in the country in the 1960s. Would go to the occasional midweek City match, and sometimes on Saturdays, after rugby league became a Sunday sport, but was never totally committed to football. As a result when I went to work in London in 1975, I needed a team to support, and chose West Ham because I had always liked their style, could relate to the homely, working class atmosphere, and it was on the District Line and meant I did not need to change trains.

Your first game
Carlisle, early 1975. Their one season in the top flight. Not a classic. My abiding memories are of Billy Bonds ploughing through the mud in classic buccaneering style, similarly other great beards of the era like Graham Paddon and Frank Lampard, and of Patsy Holland making the most of the little bit of dry ground on the wing. Holland scored in a 2-0 win, taking the ball round the Carlisle keeper and lifting it out of the mud into an empty net. Forget who scored the other. Bobby Gould?

How many games do you get to?
Not many. I live in Leeds now, and with four kids it is difficult to justify leaving the missus at home on a Saturday while I swan off down South, so usually only make it when I am working in London. This season has been the worst yet. I have only been to the Middlesbrough and Sunderland matches at home, and Blackburn and Newcastle away, and will be going to Manchester City cup replay next week.

Most memorable moment?
Has to be Trevor’s goal in the 1980 final. I was behind the other goal, and in those days at Wembley it was very difficult to make out anything going on at the other end, so the goal came to us in instalments. First the net billowed, then the roar, then the scarcely believable rumour went round the crowd claiming Brooking had scored with his head. Brilliant, and made better by the tenner I had on West Ham to win at 7- 2. Thirty-five quid in those days would buy you saveloy and chips, a stone of monkey nuts, fourteen pints of Watneys Red Barrel, and a woman.

Have you met any Hammers players?
Have interviewed Tony Cottee, and bumped into Alvin Martin at Talksport a few times. Both charming gents.

Favourite current player?
Carlton Cole. I have heard him getting dogs abuse from the crowd, and I instantly side with players who have to overcome the unthinking hostility of their own followers. I think he has done a top job, holding the fort during the injury crisis. George McCartney has been a revelation, and from the limited evidence of TV matches, I should say Freddie Ljungberg looks as though he is becoming a worthwhile acquisition.

Describe last season. How did it affect you?
I was delighted to see Curbishley installed as manager – I think we have one of the best in the business – but fully expected him to have to rebuild from the Championship. Then came a scintilla of hope, then we dared to dream, and finally fulfilment. My son supports Manchester United, and my sister and her husband are season ticket holders at Old Trafford, yet all three were pleased for me, so there was a rather sweet, warm, feeling. Strange the delight at seeing such a popular figure as Neil Warnock cast into the outer darkness.

What are your hopes for this season?
A mid-table finish, a repeat cup victory over Manchester City (which may be a vain hope by the time this appears) followed by a semi-final spot at least, and then a clean(ish) bill of health allowing us to make a realistic assault on a European place next season.

Choose your all-time Hammers eleven.
In classic 2-3-5 formation: Mervyn Day; Ray Stewart, Frank Lampard Sr.; Bonds, Martin, Moore; DiCanio, Brooking, Tevez, Peters, Sissons

What do your colleagues make of your support for West Ham?
I do a late night show for Real Radio Yorkshire, covering West and South Yorks, so Sheffield United is one of our teams, and quite a few Blades fans work alongside me. Where previously their attitude towards me was gently patronising, now I feel unalloyed hatred.


My West Ham: Don Perretta

January 11, 2008

Don Perretta is Head of Football at North One TV (producers of, among many other things, F1, World Rally, Big Ron Manager, Fifth Gear and the Gadget Show). He produced Football Italia on C4 and Bravo for many years. He was also a print journalist for many years (a staffer at Time Out for most of the 80s) and co-founder of Fortunes Always Hiding.

How did you become a Hammer?
I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t a West Ham fan but it was definitely my own decision as a young child, as there were no precedents in my family (I’m the eldest son and my dad sort of supported Fulham but he wasn’t really bothered). I grew up in South East London, so the natural choices would have been Charlton and Millwall. Happily, they were rejected before I even knew they existed. I was aware of Moore, Peters, Hurst and Ron Greenwood from about the age of four, and my support was nailed on when I saw a hugely exciting 4-3 home victory against QPR on a tiny telly in grainy black and white. For a long time I thought that game was around 1963/4, but I’ve since checked (soccerbase.com, what a site!) and it was in fact played on 2nd November 1968. So I guess that’s when I officially became a fan.

Your first game?
Though I don’t remember much about it apart from the noise and not being able to see much at all, my first game was a 2-0 home victory against Chelsea in August 1969, just before my ninth birthday. I’ve no idea who scored (I’d like to think it was a brace from Geoff Hurst) but my abiding memories of it are hearing ‘Bubbles’ properly for the first time (one of our neighbours had introduced me to the song but it only made sense inside Upton Park) and wishing someone had brought something for me to stand on. I later realized that it was my introduction to the North Bank. I no longer need anything to stand on.

How many games do you get to?
At the moment I get to loads of games. I’d had a season ticket for many years but I gave it up in protest at the Bond scheme (spit). I started to go more regularly about eight years ago (when Di Canio joined) and now I’ve got three home season tickets (Dr Martens Upper) for me and my two Hammers-mad kids, plus two away season tickets. Sheer madness but that’s what Tevez and salvation do to you.

Most memorable moment?
I thought this one would be hard but actually it’s the tearful/joyous moment at 2006 FA Cup Final when I eventually located my son at 14:50 by the fence at the perimeter of the Millennium Stadium. That was when I slid him the ticket I’d managed to get hold of inside the stadium via a friend who worked for the club. I’d been quoted £1500 outside. No way. And before you start wondering, up to that point I’d only managed to procure two tickets and it was my daughter’s turn to go as I had taken my son to the semi-final at Villa Park. We lost the final, of course, but it didn’t seem to matter so much because (a) we’d played so well and should have won and (b) I had my two children with me. My poor and long-suffering missus, who’d also come up on the off chance, had to sit and watch it in a wholefood café in the centre of Cardiff. Of the games we’ve actually won, top of the list is the 4-0 at White Hart Lane in 1981 when David ‘Psycho’ Cross scored all four goals. Priceless. The worst experience was the day trip to Palermo. In so many ways.

Have you met any Hammers players?
Luckily, through my job, I get to meet lots of footballers, some more palatable than others. Hammers I’ve met and liked include Sir Trev, Tony Cottee (an absolute gent), Frank MacAvennie (nice bloke, lives up to his rep though), Trevor Sinclair, Tony Gale (another gent), Alan McKnight and Alvin Martin. I was lucky enough to be invited to Paolo Di Canio’s house in Loughton (a gated affair with all the predictable modern footballer excesses). He had an enormous TV screen – I mean really enormous, nearly as big as the screens at Upton Park – and his wife made me a lukewarm cup of espresso coffee. Funny what you remember. He did give me the shirt he’d played in against Charlton though. Which was nice. A West Ham player I wouldn’t want to spend any more time with is John Moncur. I’ve met him twice, which to my mind is two times too many.

Favourite current player?
Robert Green by a country mile, a fantastic keeper and obviously a real character. And I quite like the idea that he’s being ignored for England duty as I believe it affects a goalie’s club form. Look at David James, in the best form of his career (he even comes for crosses!) and no longer a serious England contender. QED.

Describe last season. How did it affect you?
Last season was the most traumatic/uplifting ever. Bitter experience told me we were definitely going down (as well as that 4-0 defeat at Charlton) but a little voice I could barely hear kept telling me we still had a chance. At first it was immensely frustrating as we weren’t playing THAT badly, we just weren’t getting the results. But then our form really dived apart from the Arsenal and Man Utd home games; the Argentinian experiment wasn’t working (it had still to bite us in the bum); Nigel Mediocre in my eyes had lost all credibility/integrity; and I was hearing bad things about why Pardew had lost the dressing room. But then the turnaround happened (strangely thanks to Spurs) and so did the great escape. Last season did additionally engender in me a bitter dislike of many football/sports writers who consistently and provocatively misreported the Tevez situation. Eggy was a colossus throughout – I shall miss him greatly. I also took particular exception to columns written by Oliver Holt, Henry Winter, John Ley and Richard Williams. They will not be forgiven, ever.

What are your hopes for this season?
That we field a fully fit side that plays to the best of its ability. Realistically, I’d hoped we’d avoid the relegation scrap (which we have), so now rather than do a Charlton and take our foot off the gas, let’s bloody a few noses and push for a place in Europe. We can have some fun.

Choose your all time Hammers Eleven
Really hard – but after much thought it’s Ludo, Ray Stewart, Slaven Bilic, Bobby Moore, Julian Dicks, Mark Ward, Billy Bonds, Trevor Brooking, Devo, Paolo Di Canio, Tony Cottee. I notice there are none from the current squad, which is probably about right.

What do your colleagues make of your support for West Ham?
Amused tolerance, mostly, and occasional congratulations. Thankfully there are no Blades fans in the office as we would almost certainly have come to blows.

When you’re reporting on West Ham games how difficult is it to be objective?
Luckily I’ve only ever had to do it once when we beat Hull City 7-1 so objectivity (unnoticed) went out of the window.

Complete this sentence: The thing I hate about West Ham is…
…the time spent waiting for the ticket office to answer. (Record: close on 2 hours).

Complete this sentence: The thing I love about West Ham is…
…the sense of unity and ownership among the fans. Owners, players, managers and officials may come and go but we’ll always be there and we’re the best fans bar none. And at least once a season, the team rewards us with a stellar performance that makes all the suffering seem worthwhile.


My West Ham: Mike Gapes MP

January 9, 2008

Mike Gapes is Labour MP for Ilford South.
How did you become a Hammer?
I grew up in Hainault on the Essex side of what later became Greater London. The nearest teams were Tottenham, Leyton Orient and West Ham. Until I was 8 in 1960 I supported both The Hammers and Spurs. That year I decided that West Ham were my team. Spurs went on to win the double but my allegiance to the claret and sky blue never wavered and was rewarded six years later when West Ham won the World Cup.

Your first game?
My first professional football game was when my dad took me to see Leyton Orient draw 1-1 with Liverpool in a top of Division
Two match in 1961. My first West Ham game was the 3-3 away draw at Highbury in 1963 which was a very satisfactory result for my neutral dad because my younger brother Barry supports Arsenal ! I became a regular on the North Bank at Upton Park from 1964 onwards and then migrated to the old Chicken Run. My first seat was to watch us throw away a 3-0 lead to lose 4-3 to Stoke in 1967. (Peter Dobing v John Cushley)

How many games do you get to?
I am a season ticket holder in the Bobby Moore lower stand and only miss two or three home matches a year when Select Committee travel commitments prevent it. Nowadays I only get to a rare away game. When I was younger I tried to go to all the London away games and also followed the Hammers as far as St James’ Park.

Most memorable moment?
My most memorable moment was the Frank Lampard diving header to win the Semi Final replay in the cauldron of Elland Road in 1980 (and my resultant frightening journey back to the NUS conference in Blackpool being chased by a car full of irate Everton fans – my little mini must have been the only car driving towards Liverpool with a West Ham scarf hanging out of the window !). The 1980 final with me at one end and my Arsenal supporting brother at the other ! Also the second Cardiff play off final (I seem to have erased all memories of the first one !)

Have you met any Hammers players?
I used to deliver newspapers to Geoff Hurst who was on my regular round in Chigwell and also to Bobby Moore when I did a relief round. I met Bobby at a Labour fundraising dinner in 1991 where he was very amused to hear that his former paper boy was a would be MP. I have met Geoff Hurst several times at Conferences and events related to football. I have also met Trevor Brooking on several occasions, including when he has been helping community groups in my constituency, I met Trevor Sinclair, John Moncur, Marc Keller and Paulo Wanchope eight years ago at a Thames Gateway football match at Upton Park where I fulfilled a boyhood ambition to play on the pitch and I spoke to Ludek Miklosko, Chris Powell and Jimmy Walker at the promotion celebrations in 2005. I have also met Martin Peters, David James, Bobby Barnes, and Paul Goddard.

Favourite current player?
Favourite current player is Hayden Mullins a totally unselfish 100% team player. I also think Carlton Cole is improving game by game and working really hard for the team ,if only he could get the goals too and Mathew Upson is showing what a good player he can be, lets hope he stays fit.

What’s the football banter like in the bars of the House of Commons?
The banter in the strangers bar is pretty good but I am usually surrounded by Lancastrians who support Bolton, Wigan, Liverpool, Everton,Blackburn, Manchester United or City. Things were a bit heated last season when I put down an Early Day Motion supporting the Premier League Adjudication panel in their totally correct decision and praising our magificent achievement in winning 7 of our last 9 games. The Sheffield MPs were not amused. I even made the front page of the Sheffield Star !

Complete the sentence: West Ham fans should vote Labour because…
West Ham Fans should vote Labour for three reasons 1. because in the words of Bill Shankly “Football is socialism in practice”… 2. because it was Thatcher who tried to bring in the Football ID card scheme and ban on away supporters and 3. because “ from Stamford Bridge to Upton Park you can stick the blue flag …..”

Describe last season. How did it affect you?
Last season was the most depressing and exhilarating ever with that fantastic great escape ending but why didn’t our managers appreciate the fantastic talent of Carlos Tevez (and Mascherano too ) until it was almost too late ! Great credit to the efforts of Bobby Zamora, Robert Green, Lucas Neill and Mark Noble

What are your hopes for this season?
My hopes for this season are top six but realistically top nine and winning the FA Cup (I am an eternal optimist having just got home from the goaless FA cup third round.)

Choose your all time Hammers Eleven
Ludek Miklosko
Ray Stewart
Frank Lampard
Billy Bonds
Alvin Martin
Bobby Moore
Martin Peters
Frank McAvennie
Trevor Brooking
Geoff Hurst
Paolo di Canio

Substitutes
Phil Parkes
Rio Ferdinand
Paul Allen
Tony Cottee
Bryan ‘Pop’ Robson

Manager John Lyall

What do your colleagues make of your support for West Ham
Many of my Parliamentary colleagues think I am completely mad in my obsessive and biased support for the Hammers. I was once during the dark 18 years of Tory rule asked whether I would prefer a Labour Government or West Ham to win the League and I had to answer “We have had Labour Government’s in the past”… My overwhelming aspiration is that we can have both simultaneously this decade !


My West Ham: Mark Sandell

January 6, 2008

Mark Sandell is producer of WORLD HAVE YOUR SAY on the BBC World Service. Before that he was a producer on various 5 Live programmes including Nicky Campbell’s show. He is married to 5 Live presenter Victoria Derbyshire, a Bolton Wanderers fanatic.

How did you become a Hammer?
My dad and his dad and his dad being Hammers definitely helped but growing up in Essex clinched it.

Your first game?
1965, West Ham 1 Sunderland 1. I may be imagining this but I’ve always believed our goal was an overhead kick from Martin Peters. I was standing on a beer crate and when we scored the bloke the other side of me elbowed me in the eye accidentally. When my dad looked down on me he saw I was crying and he alleges he told me to “get used to it son ” .

How many games do you get to?
All the home games as I’m an East Upper season ticket holder. Usually do a few away games as well, mainly in London, and Newcastle and Bolton as I have friends/family there.

Most memorable moment?
Really hard this one. Trevor’s farewell game ? Paolo against Bradford ? The play-off semi v Ipswich when I’d never heard such a brilliant noise at Upton Park ? I might go for Paolo’s winner against Chelsea in his last game at our place even if that feeling of hope didn’t last long. But that’s supporting West Ham isn’t it ? I also remember the end of the 1980 Cup Final and holding on to the fence at the end. I saw Billy start walking up the steps and after that, I couldn’t see a lot because….ahem….there must have been a lot of dust in the air.

Have you met any Hammers players?
Yes, Paolo on a couple of occasions. My eldest son’s middle name is Paolo (he was named after the great man) so we had something to talk about. He came in to do a radio programme I was working on when his book came out and I’d never seen so many grown men behaving like kids. Having said that, I got my shirt signed and the signed picture of me with him is on permanent display at home. I also have a picture of me shaking hands with Sir Trevor- embarrassingly I am clearly holding my stomach in.

I got to know Iain Dowie through 5 Live (a really nice bloke and a real thinker about the game) and when I was at Capital Gold, Phil Parkes, Alan Devonshire and Paul Ince who then, despite being a hate figure now, was a very charming bloke. I was working at Radio 1 when I met Lee Chapman who was in to do an interview at a time when he was getting a bit of stick from our fans. I got on well with him until he told me that Hammers legends like Billy Bonds and Bobby Moore had got some stick too – I told him in no uncertain terms that was bollocks, to put it bluntly and I was annoyed at the implication that he was up there with them. Also while at Capital I was told by my then boss – Richard Park – to “get an interview with Frankie Mac” on his return to West Ham, even though he wasn’t talking to anyone. “Mention my name” was the extra bit of helpful advice from the Fame Academy judge. As Mr McAvennie left the dressing room, I broke free of all the rest of the hacks and suggested to Frankie that “Richard Park says you might want to have a quick chat for Capital Gold” – “Fuck off” was the Scottish international’s witty reply – “and Richard Park can fuck off too”, he added for good measure. The walk back to the rest of the reporters was a long one.

Favourite current player?
Johnny Pantsil is rightly becoming a cult hero (and we like to think we led this from the East Upper), and Nobby Solano has bags of skill for a bloke who looks 48 years old. George McCartney would be my early vote for Hammer of the Year for the way he’s come on, but I’ll be predictable and say Deano, even if he looks like he could lose a pound or two, which is rich coming from me..

Describe last season. How did it affect you?
I veered from anger at the baby Bentleys (and Nigel cupping his ear at our stand after he scored against Man Utd nearly took the magic out of the moment) and the lack of application to tremendous pride in the way they pulled together at the end. Everyone praises Carlos – and rightly so – but Lucas Neill, Mark Noble and Robert Green can take a bow too. Watching the last game on my own in front of a split screen was agony too. In the end I felt a bit flat. It was the fourth season where we’d gone right down to the wire, and I might settle for a season that’s over in say, March, this year. That’s not to say I wouldn’t take another cup run.

What are your hopes for this season?
Tenth and 5th round of the cup. Maybe – just maybe – with more than 12 fit players we could try for UEFA spot next year.

Choose your all time Hammers Eleven
Phil Parkes, Ray Stewart, Julian Dicks, Billy Bonds, Bobby Moore, Trevor Brooking , Stuart Slater, Alan Devonshire, Carlos Tevez and Paolo and Sir Geoff up front. We’d entertain at least and for once there’d be competition for free kicks.

What do your colleagues make of your support for West Ham?
They indulge me,and like most people they take the mick when things are bad and text me in numbers when we’ve had the odd good result. With the possible exception of last year and the Carlos business, I find very few people who really dislike us.


My West Ham: Peter Oborne

December 28, 2007

Peter Oborne is Chief Political Columnist for the Daily Mail
How did you become a Hammer?
It often surprises people that I support West Ham, since I do not come from the east End. The reason is as follows. My father was in the British Army and almost always abroad, mainly in Germany. When I was eight I was sent back to prep school in England and this was where I first came across soccer. Most of the boys at this school supported Spurs, Chelsea or Leeds, who were then dominant. Out of perversity I chose to become a West Ham supporter. It was then the great days of Moore, Hurst and Peters. I have remained loyal ever since.

Your first game?
This must have been Cambridge United versus West Ham in the late seventies. I think West Ham won. I have a memory of Cross being furious with co-striker Goddard for failing to pass the ball when he had a great chance in front of goal.

How many games do you get to?
I haven’t been to a West Ham game for ten years. We live in Highbury and my children support the Arsenal. I apologise for this.

Most memorable moment?
West Ham are always memorable. Any number of Houdini like relegation escapes. I still feel furious about the way we exchanged Peters at the height of his skills for Jimmy Greaves who was at the end of his career and retired almost at once. And beating Sunderland 8-0 (G Hurst scoring 6 of them)

Have you met any Hammers players?
I once met the late Bobby Moore for a few moments at the Cheltenham Festival of horse-racing. It was wonderful to be in the presence of greatness, and he seemed such a nice and modest man.

Favourite current player?
I’m afraid I don’t have one.

What’s the football banter like in the bars of the House of Commons?
There’s something bogus about it. Politicians pretend to be interested in football in order to engage with voters.

Describe last season. How did it affect you?
It was just fantastic. Even by West Ham’s standards it was an awesome escape. A journey from despair to elation. I think Curbishley is wonderful.

What are your hopes for this season?
To avoid relegation. Anything else is a bonus.

Choose your all time Hammers Eleven
Standen, Martin, Dicks, Ferdinand, Moore, Bonds, Devonshire, Brooking, Peters, Hurst, Di Canio. (manager: Greenwood)

What do your colleagues make of your support for West Ham?
Baffled.


My West Ham: Rt Hon Tony McNulty MP

December 13, 2007

Tony McNulty is Labour MP for Harrow East and Minister of State in the Home Office in charge of Police. He is a season ticket holder, but is often spied in the Director’s Box, just above where I sit. We have a ritual of waving to each other (usually using more than two fingers) just before the game.

How did you become a Hammer?
I grew up in West London, around Ladbroke Grove and Notting Hill, in the 60s when everyone but everyone supported the real ‘sexy, swinging sixties’ teams of the day – Chelsea and QPR. I got really fed up with this and could not see the attraction so when West Ham won the World Cup in 1966 – my search for a team was over and I have supported WHUFC ever since.

Your first game?
I can’t remember my first game – memory fading clearly – but it would have been when I was eleven or twelve – around about 1970-71. I remember the 5-5 draw with Chelsea, but not if I went. I certainly remember being at games with Bobby Moore still playing, I think, and Clyde Best and Ade Coker. I was at the 1975 Cup Final against Fulham and the 1976 Cup-Winners Cup final in Brussels against Anderlecht at the Heysel Stadium. At the Anderlecht Final I remember, much to my subsequent embarassment given my current career, carrying around a huge banner that read “Bonds eats Sprouts”!

How many games do you get to?
I try to get to as many Home games as possible, and the occassional away game – mostly elsewhere in London. This season I think I have only missed the Man.City game at the start of the season. In terms of away games this season, I got to Chelsea’s jammy 1-0 at Stamford Bridge recently where we were very unlucky after playing so well and went to Coventry for our 2-1 victory at the last minute.

Most memorable moment?
The 1975 Cup Final was a highlight, as was 1980. I thought the atmosphere at the Ipswich play-off semi, before the horror of the play-off with Crystal Palace, was just awesome – the Boleyn as a very loud No.12. The 3-3 final against Liverpool was memorable – except for the last 90 seconds! Tevez goal at Old Trafford last game of last season. A special favourite is sitting the North Bank at Arsenal, surrrounded by Arsenal fans, for West Ham’s last game there ever – and the rest is history!!

Have you met any Hammers players?
I have met Trevor Brooking, and I had the great pleasure last season of meeting Billy Bonds – a real hero of mine and all-round favourite Hammer. Also, Bobby Barnes – who I know through his PFA work.

Favourite current player?
Robert Green and Dean Ashton

What’s the football banter like in the bars of the House of Commons?
Banter in the Commons is a bit limited as it seemes to be full of Man. United and Liverpool fans – with a smattering of Arsenal. This season it is easier to let West Ham’s football do the talking. Last season was worse – they all had an opinion on West Ham – mostly stone cold wrong of course, as were their predictions about our fate.

Complete the sentence: West Ham fans should vote Labour because…
….Frank Lampard is a Tory.

Describe last season. How did it affect you?
It is easy to say now, but I always thought that we would survive last season and we really should give Carlos a huge welcome when he comes back on the 29th December. I had so much faith – I went up to Old Trafford for the last game of the season – hoping, praying and knowing we would be alright. It was a very very good day. Throughout the emotional roller-coaster of a season, just like everyone else , I rode the ups and downs week in and week out. It was horrible and I don’t want it ro be repeated anytime soon. It was like being in a Groundhog Day film – with the day we were all condemned to repeat over and over being the Play-Off final against Crystal Palace – especially the journey home from Cardiff.

What are your hopes for this season?
I still think that we have a very real chance on a top six finish – we have got good results whilst carrying significant injuries and, hopefully, the worst of them are behind us. Less than top ten would be a disappointment – then consolidate and Europe next season but not the two-bob cup.

Choose your all time Hammers Eleven
From :
Robert Green (maybe Ludo)
Billy Bonds
Ray Stewart
Rio Ferdinand
Bobby Moore
Alvin Martin
Joe Cole
Alan Devonshire
Yossi Benayoun
Trevor Brooking
Carlos Tevez
Pop Robson
Liam Brady
and probably Mascherano if he had got a chance.

What do your colleagues make of your support for West Ham?
They had great fun last season but don’t have much to say this year. It is still the case that many of them would put West Ham as their second team – a source of pride.
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My West Ham: Nigel Morris

December 10, 2007

Nigel Morris is Home Affairs Editor of The Independent and is married to Radio 4’s Carolynn Quinn, who I have also asked to do us the honour…

How did you become a Hammer?
There was no choice growing up in Brentwood a few years after we’d won the World Cup! I got Geoff Hurst’s autograph when I was seven and that was that.

Your first game?
Although he was born in West Ham, my Dad is a life-long Arsenal fan and took me to see Arsenal v West Ham at Highbury in the early 70s. West Ham lost 3-0, but it was too late: I was already claret and blue through and through.

How many games do you get to?
There’s group of four of us who have season tickets together in the Upper East stand. We also get to a few away games a year – I have seen WHU at most Premiership grounds.

Most memorable moment?
Loads! There was nothing to match the thrill of the play-off win against Preston at Cardiff. Apart, that is, of the amazing feeling of winning at Old Trafford last year to stay up. A personal favourite was a fantastic goal scored by Liam Brady at the old Baseball Ground.

Have you met any Hammers players?
A handful over the years: Trevor Brooking gave me a lift to the station in his car after I interviewed him for my student paper!

Favourite current player?
Last season it would have been between Yossi Benayoun and Carlos Tevez as I love the flair players. I have high hopes of Julien Faubert once he plays. So far this season I would pick George McCartney who has really blossomed.

Describe last season. How did it affect you?
Agony and ecstasy. There’s rarely a dull season supporting West Ham, but last year was nuts even by our surreal standards. As we sat in freezing stands at Bolton flattered by a 4-0 defeat it was unthinkable we’d end up doing the double over Arsenal and Man Utd.

What are your hopes for this season?
A top half finish will do me just fine (I have had enough of rollercoaster seasons for the moment) and then a push towards a European place in 2008-09.

Choose your all time Hammers XI
Robert Green
Julian Dicks
Ray Stewart
Rio Ferdinand
Billy Bonds
Bobby Moore
Joe Cole
Alan Devonshire
Trevor Brooking
Paolo Di Canio
Geoff Hurst

Subs: Phil Parkes, Slaven Bilic, Alvin Martin, Yossi Benyanoun, Frank McAvennie

What do your colleagues make of your support for West Ham?
One supports Spurs, another Preston and another Rochdale, so they’ve got no grounds to mock.


My West Ham: David Cracknell

December 8, 2007

David Cracknell is Political Editor of the Sunday Times. He is shortly leaving the paper to take charge of the political lobbying company, LLM.

How did you become a Hammer?
My mum and dad are from East London so it was a natural thing. There are four season tickets in the family, although as I’ve worked on Saturdays for the past ten years I haven’t had one. But in my new job I get my weekends back, so if anyone knows a mate of a mate who’s got one, please get in touch!

Your first game?
Must have been sometime in 1974, aged six, because I was a mad fan by the time we won the FA Cup the following year. My dad took me to the Chicken Run, so that always feels like home. I remember Frank Lampard, Trevor Brooking always with his tongue in his cheek, looking to make the perfect pass.

How many games do you get to?
Not enough at the moment as I have to rely on someone pulling out, and its had to be on Sundays or mid-week. I went a lot more when we were in the Championship a few years ago because you could just turn up. I went to Cardiff though, three times in a row.

Most memorable moment?
Probably that play-off semi-final at Upton Park where we beat Ipswich. I’ve never experienced an atmosphere like it. Deafening as well. Pards dancing around like a lunatic in that “Moore than a football club” T-shirt. Then we lost to Crystal Palace in Cardiff …

Have you met any Hammers players?
I’ve met Brooking, but only a couple of years ago. He’s very passionate about sport in schools these days. My dad always said: “Now there’s a footballer with O levels!” My GP is one of the West Ham doctors – my mum ran his surgery practice for years – does that count?. I bumped into Bob Zamora straight after we lost to Liverpool at Cardiff – I was lucky enough to be invited into the WAGs area after the game. As you can imagine, it wasn’t a happy occasion after getting so close to victory!

I’m most proud of having played on the hallowed Boleyn turf though. It was a charity match against MPs a couple of years ago. We used the home dressing room, which was an honour. I didn’t play very well though – I think I was a bit overawed by the whole thing!

Favourite current player?
We all have to love Robert Green at the moment, don’t we. Should be England’s No1. But am a fan of a good East London Academy boy like Mark Noble – although, like a lot of its graduates (Lampard, Carrick, Joe Cole etc) I reckon he probably needs to move on to blossom. (Sorry!)

What’s the football banter like in the bars of the House of Commons?
Non-stop. As you probably know, the Labour MP Jim Fitzpatrick is a Hammer, and the minister Tony McNulty. Ahead of the party conference games, when our Lobby team plays the MPs, there’s always a lot of joshing with Labour’s frontmen Ed Balls and Andy Burnham.

Describe last season. How did it affect you?
Emotional, wasn’t it?! A Shakespearian almost-tragedy.The whole Argentinian fiasco unsettling the team and then at the end of it Tevez (and Green, of course) rescue us from demotion.

What are your hopes for this season?
Well we’re going to stay up for sure. Ideally finish well inside the top half. If we put on a spurt after Christmas I’d hope we’d make Europe. I’d like to see Deano have a purple patch and for Freddie to show us a bit of that old Highbury skill.

Choose your all time Hammers Eleven

1. Robert Green
2. Billy Bonds
3. Frank Lampard
4. Julian Dicks
5. Alvin Martin
6. Bobby Moore
7. Frank McAvennie
8. Paulo Di Canio
9. ‘Pop’ Robson
10. Trevor Brooking
11. Alan Devonshire

What do your colleagues make of your support for West Ham
They often pity me …

COMING SOON: Labour MP Tony McNulty…


My West Ham: Simon Walters

November 30, 2007

I’m starting a new series on the blog asking figures from politics and the media about their support for the Hammers. We start off today with the Political Editor of the Mail on Sunday, Simon Walters.

How did you become a Hammer?
I became a Hammer because my mum grew up in the East End and as children, we used to visit my grandparents’ home there often.

Your first game?
Not sure about first game but the first one I remember is Chelsea v W Ham at Stamford Bridge which was a 5 – 5 draw. Must have been the Sixties.

How many games do you get to?
How many games do I get to? One or two a year mainly because I work on Saturdays. Managed to get to W Ham v Spurs on Sunday. What a save! Gave up going as a teenager partly because I got scragged on the Tube by QPR fans on the Tube. They stole my scarf and bobble hat.

Most memorable moment?
Most memorable moment at a live match was the 5 – 5 draw, though 1 – 0 over Man U at home last yr in Curbs’ first match came close.

Have you met any Hammers players?
Only Hammers player I recall meeting was Trevor Brooking who I persuaded to attend a childrens Xmas party at the Commons Press gallery.

Favourite current player?
Dean Ashton

What’s the football banter like in the bars of the House of Commons?
The only soccer banter I take part in at the Commons is with a Tory MP who once offered out of the blue – so to speak – to take me to a W Ham match. That was 15 years ago. I am still waiting and I remind him every time I see him.

Describe last season. How did it affect you?
My memory of last season is the Tevez goal at Old Trafford. I ran round my brother in law’s house screaming like a whirling dervish. I went there because he has Sky TV. He is a Man U fan and was Old Trafford – poor bloke.

What are your hopes for this season?
Two more wins and we could be eighth. As a Fulham fan pal of mine said the other day, we spend our whole lives saying that.

Choose your all time Hammers Eleven
Tevez x 5, Moore x 5, Robert Green.


A New Series: My West Ham

January 28, 2007

A reader of my other blog sent me this today and I asked if I could put it on here. Enjoy…

The reason for writing this email now is to share with you the pain and suffering over our beloved Hammers you have clearly demonstrated in your new West Ham blog. I started attending matches during the latter years of the Moore/Hurst era, with Peters having gone to Spurs. After four years on the waiting list, I finally got two season tickets in the early 80’s but gave them up later that decade as it became progressively more difficult to get to matches and I was by then lending the tickets out virtually on a permanent basis. There were some great times but being a Hammers supporter requires a strong heart. I now find something to occupy my mind on a Saturday afternoon to pass the time quickly, but cannot help myself from tuning-in from time to time, usually wishing I hadn’t. The absolute joy of a two-goal lead last Saturday turning to near depression at final whistle was a typical example of how everything seems to have gone wrong since the 90th minute of the Cup Final. I try to console myself now, as I did last time, that being near the top of the Championship is better than continually languishing near the bottom of the Premiership, but I am of course deluded. It isn’t. The problem is, we seemed likely to get out of the mire until the final game last time. This time, with the poor results, the lack of any luck, the injuries, player discontent and the transfer problems, the whiff of the inevitable death pervades virtually everything going on at the moment.

I attended the Cup Final in 1980 as a member of West Ham United Executive club. We were taken in a luxury coach, given best seats at Wembley and a dinner at the Savoy that evening. There was a raffle at the end of the night, drawn by Billy Bonds. I won what, for me, was the star prize – Trevor Brooking’s signed shirt and a WHU football signed by the team. Brooking, of course, scored the winning goal – with his head! And he is my all time hero player. My WHU memorabilia, including the FA Cup winning items are kept carefully boxed, in a heated outbuilding I use for my business record archive.

I am not, in real life, a superstitious man but when it comes to football I have done my share of not having a haircut, wearing the same clothes etc during winning runs. So you will understand why I believe that the writing is on the wall for us this season now that I have discovered a family of mice have nested in the very box containing my Cup winning items, peeing all over the shirt and chewing the football.

If you’d like to email me your own West Ham memories, feel free. I’ll publish the best of them