WBA Match Report: Missing Cole Already

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I was very tempted to skip this match and watch it on TV. But you know me… Wrong decision every time. It was the worst match I have seen at Upton Park since, well, the last one – probably Spurs in December. Frankly, there are very few positives to pick out from this game, but I’ll do my best.

Firstly, the debut of Junior Stanislas promised much. He whipped in a couple of excellent crosses, which, had Cole been playing, he would have been on the end of. He also showed some neat trickery on the left and seemed at home from the word go. In fact, in 20 minutes he looked more dangerous than Savio had in the previous 70. Which wasn’t difficult. More on Savio in a moment.

The second positive was the solid performance of Radoslav Kovac. He seems to improve with each game. He won some excellent tackles and was the only West Ham player to win any headers. I’d say he was Man of the Match.

James Tomkins had a busy and solid game, as did Lucas Neill. Otherwise, dear oh dear. Upson was stretchered off – it seems we lose one player a game at the moment.

Ilunga had a complete off day, losing the ball on countless occasions. As did Mark Noble, who looks a shadow of his former self. Even Scott Parker had a spate of giving needless balls away, although otherwise he had a reasonable game.

Savio showed the occasional neat bit of trickery but far too often lost out when in possession. He is shoved off the ball all too easily. I still think he is being played in the wrong position, though. He needs to play behind the lead striker in the centre. I just don’t see him on the wing.

Up front Di Michele had a few mazy runs which amounted to nothing. He was busy but ineffective. Sears looked brighter than in previous games but didn’t have a serious shot in the whole game.

All in all, you have to give credit to West Brom. They came to do a job and they did it with relative ease. They shut us down brilliantly and allowed our midfield very little time on the ball. They won everything in the air. Their only problem was that they had nothing up front either. They squandered two golden chances. It pains me to say it, but they were the better side. But let’s put it in perspective. We were without our leading striker, two of our three best midfielders, our first choice centre back and played half the game without the other one.

It’s two points lost, but I can remember many similar games when we’d have lost a game like this.

Green 7
Ilunga 4
Spector 5
Upson 6
Tomkins 7
Noble 4
Parker 7
Kovac 7
Savio 5
Stanislas 7
Di Michele 5
Sears 6
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Stoke Match Report: Down With the Tottenham!

This is the sort of match which we often fail to get anything out of. But we came good in the end. It certainly wasn’t our best performance of the season, but we did deserve the three points. Stoke didn’t help themselves by self-combusting. They weren’t the worst team we will play this season, but despite being first to the ball a lot of the time, they failed to capitalise on the possession they had.

I can’t ever recall a player being sent off for hitting one of his own teammates, but that is what happened to Ricardo Fuller just as Stoke were kicking off following the West Ham goal. I suppose it’s this sort of thing that keeps us going to matches. Just when you think you have seen it all.

Our clear man of the match was Valon Behrami. What an engine he has. I don’t think I have ever seen a player like him. Tenacious is a word which hardly does him justice. He was all over the pitch and won the ball back countless times. When he first came to the club I thought he was a headless chicken, but he knows exactly what he is doing. I didn’t think I would ever admit a player deserved to keep Noble out of the team, but I will make an exception for Behrami.

Overall, the midfield had quite a good balance to it. Scott Parker was all over the pitch too, although too often his final ball was off beam. He takes too long to decide what to do with it and today missed the obvious ball on too many occasions. Luis Boa Morte had one of his better days today and in the second half gave the team some much needed width, although he still had an annoying tendency to drift infield. Jack Collison was superb again and quite why he was subbed is anyone’s guess. His tackling was effective and he was probably the most creative of the midfield four. He’s also not afraid to shoot.

With two of our defenders being changed (O’Neill and Davenport) I suppose it was inevitable that we looked shaky at the back on occasion. The Stoke goal came about because neither Faubert, nor Collins picked up Faye from the corner. Otherwise Collins was commanding in the air and had a good game. The same cannot be said, unfortunately, for Julien Faubert, who has joined Carlton Cole as the crowd’s favourite whipping boy. At times he was simply awful, giving away possession too easily and being weak in the tackle. He fared a little better in his regular forays forward, but too often his crosses were misdirected.

Carlton Cole was largely anonymous in the first half and only really came to life after he scored. Confidence is a wonderful thing. The truth is he should have scored immediately after the Stoke goal. A poacher would have tucked away Collison’s cross without thinking twice. Cole blasted wide. But for all that, he was miles better than the totally ineffective David di Michele. Apart from a skilful cross, he contributed very little to the game and it was a mystery to us all when Zola substituted Tristan for Collison rather than di Michele.

Tristan again looked totally out of it after he on for the last 20 minutes. Yes, he scored, but it was quite a flukey goal. I couldn’t understand why Zola thought Tristan or di Michele were better bets than Freddie Sears. But why should I complain? We got three points and now sit in tenth place, just one win away from a European place. What a difference a week makes, eh?

Green 7
Ilunga 7
Upson 7
Collins 7
Faubert 5
Behrami 8
Collison 8
Boa Morte 6
Parker 6
Cole 6
di Michele 4

UPDATE: To all those Spurs fans leaving comments protesting (several using very homophobic language) at the headline to this article, your comments won’t get through moderation. So piss off.

Chelsea Report: Battling Hammers Impress

Oh Carlton Cole! You could have been a hero, yet as so often you scuffed your shot. But let’s not be too pernickety. This was a battling performance of the highest order. To play Chelsea at Stamford Bridge and emerge with anything is a credit to the team. To nearly emerge with three points was perhaps asking too much.

When Bellamy put us one up so early on, I don’t think many of thought Chelsea wouldn’t score at least one goal, and so it proved. Under this amount of pressure far better teams than West Ham have cracked. We didn’t and it is a tribute to the central midfielders and central defenders that we managed to maintain out discipline.

Up front Bellamy battled and harried as if his life depended on it. He took his goal brilliantly. Cole was useless in the first half and lost possession almost every time he got the ball. In the second half he somehow discovered some controlled aggression and managed to hold the ball up well and had a couple of chances he should have done better with.

In midfield Scott Parker was magnificent. Noble too showed some of his old form and battled away. Behrami was everywhere as usual and Collison improved after a largely anonymous first 20 minutes. His close control became excellent.

At the back I thought Davenport and Upson looked very comfortable together and rarely looked troubled in the first half. Ilunga had a much better game than against Spurs. Lucas Neill didn’t do anything spectacular, but then he never does. He was lucky not to give away a penalty late on for a trip on Kalou, I think it was. Luckily the tosser of a referee didn’t see it. I cannot abide Mike Riley. He always seems to ruin a game.

Anyway, I think we can all be well impressed by that performance. Now let’s beat the Villa on Saturday!

Green 8
Ilunga 7
Neill 6
Upson 7
Davenport 7
Noble 7
Parker 8
Behrami 7
Collison 7
Cole 6
Bellamy 7

UPDATE: Just so we realise what this means, it’s the second away draw against a Top 4 side this season.

Wigan Report

My trip to the ground did not get off to the best of starts. Driving up the A20 I suddenly realised I hadn’t put my season ticket in my wallet. Luckily the ticket office happily issued me with a replacement.

But the day soon improved when an on fire Dean Ashton fired us two ahead in the first fifteen minutes. It has to be said that Wigan had had the better of the opening exchanges, and somehow you just knew that West Ham would revert to type and fail to get the all important third. And so it transpired.

We put together some neat one to one play, and always looked dangerous in their penalty area, but just couldn’t find the third. Wigan were by far the better side in the second half and were unlucky to come away with nothing.

Let’s face it, we were lucky to come away with all three points, but having said that, so what? It was a reasonable performance for the first game of the season and we should be grateful it was rather better than last season’s first game against Man City.

While I think of it, it was a bit odd seeing seven subs on the bench. I have to admit I wasn’t aware of that particular innovation. But it’s great, and means that a couple of the youngsters get some big match experience, even if all they do is get splinters in their arses … although I doubt there are many splinters on those new Recaro seats!

So, let’s have a look at some of the individual performances. Deano obviously gets the headlines, but he contributed far more than his two goals. He was really mobile and chased everything. I just hope he hasn’t injured too much. Carlton Cole did well in the first half. He won a lot in the air and constsntly harried. Freddie Sears looked very bright when he came on for Deano. He has beefed up a bit and is more difficult to shake off the ball. In midfield, Mark Noble was hugely disappointing and Scott Parker wasn’t his usual self. Their failure to control the agenda allowed Wigan to dominate the centre of the pitch. Matty Etherington had a storming first half but faded badly in the second. Julien Faubert was my man of the match. He put in 100% effort, was great on the wing, wasn’t afraid to shoot and had a few good dribbles. I reckon he may get 10 goals this season. In defence Lucas Neill was his normal self. He managed to get bypassed on at least half a dozen occasions. Sadly, Behrami was even worse. He was run ragged by the Wigan left winger and must have wondered what had hit him. If right back is his best position then … well, let’s not be too harsh, it was only his first game. In the centre Upson was stalwart and Davenport performed well too. And Greeny was superb.

All in all, a satisfactory start.

Green 8
Upson 8
Davenport 7
Neill 5
Behrami 5
Noble 5
Parker 6
Etherington 7
Faubert 9
Ashton 9
Cole 6

Newcastle Match Report

This was the most entertaining match since our victory over Liverpool in late January. In fact, perhaps the first half was our best half of the entire season. We were literally on fire from the outset. Perhaps the visiting Paolo di Canio had gone into the dressing room and given a pre match motivational team talk? Newcastle were not at the races and until they scored they had not had a shot. Indeed, they only had one shot in the second half.

Let’s start with the midfield. Faubert and Ljungberg ran Newcastle ragged down the wings for the first twenty minutes. What a shame Freddie was stretchered off with a cracked rib (and may miss the Euros) mid way through the first half to be replaced the Boa Morte. Scott Parker was absolutely immense, especially in the first half, while Mark Noble took his goal brilliantly and combined superbly with Parker both defensively and in attack. But special pride of place goes to Julien Faubert, who showed some amazing bursts of pace and put in some excellent crosses. He really showed that he will be immense for us next season, and if Parker hadn’t been so brilliant, he would have been my man of the match. Parker is now on England form.

Defensively, James Tomkins looked superb, apart from being to blame for the first goal. His heading was spot on and he was tough in his tackled. He’s also a danger at corners in the opponents’ box. He did make a mistake for the goal, but he’ll learn from it. Lucas Neill had a few hairy moments in the second half. George McCartney was brilliant (again) bombing down the left and put in a real attacking performance. And John Pantsil had his best game for us so far. He really can be a joy to watch with his hugely enthusiastic attitude.

Up front Dean Ashton was busy all over the place and a constant threat. His goal was a classic striker’s goal, where he made something out of very little. Bobby Zamora was at his most frustrating. He tried and tried but absolutely nothing he tried came off. Carlton Cole looked far better when he came on and should retain his place for the Man U game, although I suspect we will play 4-5-1 at Old Trafford.

Uriah Rennie certainly had a game of two halves. He had a good first half but his decisions in the second half defied logic. It shows how times change when instead of “The referee’s a bastard” we heard constant chants of “You’re not fit to be a referee”. How quaint.

And finally, why oh why was their no pre match announcement that Paolo di Canio was “in da Stafium”? The crowd sooned spotted him and we all went wild, revisiting old memories with sporadic and very loud chants of the Paolo di Canio Rigoletto chant. He’s still a hero to many of us and the best player I have ever seen in a West Ham shirt. And the scores on the doors…

Green 8
McCartney 8
Neill 6
Tomkins 7
Pantsil 8
Noble 8
Parker 9
Ljungberg 8 (Boa Morte 5)
Faubert 9
Ashton 8
Zamora 6 (Cole 7)

PS And for once I predicted the score correctly!

Derby Match Report: A Curate’s Egg

This was a perversely enjoyable game, which kind of summed up our entire season. Good in parts, awful in others. Derby were better than expected – very committed but lacking any real invention. When Robbie Savage is relied upon for set pieces, you know you are in trouble. In truth, West Ham could have won this 4-1 or 5-1 with several clear chances going begging. On the other hand, Derby nearly snatched an equaliser at the end. So, let’s look at the plus points.

The biggest revelation for me was the performance of James Tomkins. Indeed, I would rate him as man of the match. He was assured, confident and looked completely at home. He must have touched the ball at least twice as often as his partner in central defence, Lucas Neill. He has a great balance about him. At first, his loping style reminded me a bit of Elliott Ward, but there’s also a touch of the Rio Ferdinands about him. Make no mistake, we have discovered a diamond here. It wouldn’t surprise me if he became a regular next season.

Elsewhere in defence Lucas Neill had a quiet game, but was reasonably solid. I still think this is his best position. His replacement at right back John Pantsil had an average game. It has to be said that he is better in attack. He made a superb daisy cutter through ball towards the end which nearly resulted in a goal. George McCartney had a quieter game. He’s certainly a contender for Hammer of the Year, but I wish he’d get more confidence in the final third.

In midfield, both Parker and Noble put in strong performances. These two are clearly our first choice central midfield, but they have played very few games together so far -this was only the third. My only worry is that they are very similar players – both tenacious, hard tacklers. Noble is slightly more creative, but perhaps they are too samey to be a successful midfield duo? We’ll find out next season.

For the first time for a long time we played with two out and out wingers. At times we were playing 4-2-4. Ljungberg got better as the game went on. Unfortunately he was at fault for being offside when Zamora scored a goal that had to be disallowed. He had some brilliant interplay with Noble before haring off down the left to cross for Carlton Cole to score the winning goal. Freddie is not my favourite player and I have to say I won’t be heartbroken if he goes during the summer, but credit to him for some of his work today. Julien Faubert was a little diappointing. He played in several good crosses in the first quarter of an hour and his a rasping twenty five yeard shot and I saw enough to believe he’s the real deal, but I wasn’t surprised when he was subbed. He’s coming back after a bad injury and needs games.

I presume Dean Ashton was ill or injured, but Bobby Zamora had a good game. Yes, the frustrations we all know about were still self evident, but nevertheless he did well in winning headers and holding the ball up and took his goal well. Freddie Sears, however, was a different story. I’m afraid he was not at the races today. He barely touched the ball in the first half and when he did have it he looked strangely hesitant. I thought he was subbed at exactly the right time. Parts of the crowd actually booed Carlton Cole onto the pitch which I found reprehensible. “You don’t know what you’re doing” rang out around the ground, suggesting the Curbishley should have kept Sears on the pitch. I was incredulous. And then a few minutes later Carlton Cole rammed their words right down their idiotic throats.

Robert Green was in superb form, making two world class saves. The one he made at the feet of Tyrone Mears was incredible. Certainly England class.

I want to sing the praises of the Derby fans. They have had to put up with a lot this season but they were loud and proud today. Whenever they got a corner it was as if they had scored. They sang throughout the game and were undoubtedly the best away fans we have had at Upton Park this season.

A final word about the referee, Steve Tanner, who I thought had a fantastic game. And it’s not often I say that. He was in complete command throughout. And so to the points…

Green 8
McCartney 7
Neill 6
Tomkins 9
Pantsil 6
Noble 8
Parker 7
Ljungberg 7
Faubert 6
Sears 5
Zamora 7

Portsmouth Match Report

Portsmouth seem to become our bogey team. They certainly didn’t deserve to win last night’s game, but then again after our second half performance neither did we. In the first half we looked bright without really being a constant danger. We scorned two good chances and that was about it. After the break headless chicken syndrome seemed to descend on some players, especially the central midfield pairing of Mullins and Parker. Mullins put in his worst performance of the season. You can’t fault his effort, but his passing was dire.

Up front Dean Ashton did well in the first half but only had one shot, while Zamora was largely anonymous apart from his scandalous miss from an acute angle.

The brightest player and certainly the first half man of the match was (whisper it) Luis Boa Morte. No, I couldn’t believe it either.He was tenacious in his tackling and had several mazy runs. He disappeared a bit after half time but it was his best game for us by far.

Defensively we rarely looked troubled. Their goal was a long range shot which should have been shut down but apart from that Pompey lacked ideas. Nugent constantly harried our defenders but to little avail. Lucas Neill put in another average performance and looked to have suffered a bad knock towards the end which will probably keep him out of the next game.Johnny Pantsil, your time may have come.

Freddie Sears replaced Zamora after an hour but had little effect on a rather boring game. At one point I turned to my neighbour and asked him if he think of a memorable game here this season apart from the Liverpool and Man U victoried. He couldn’t and neither could I. And so to the scores…

Green 8
Neill 6
McCartney 7
Ferdinand 7
Spector 7
Solano 7
Boa Morte 8
Mullins 5
Parker 6
Ashton 7
Zamora 5
Sears 6

Everton Match Report

Make no mistake, this was a good result. It’s also a game we could easily have won. How wonderful was it to see Freddie Sears and Dean Ashton linking up so well, and Freddie nearly scoring the winner? It would have been no more than he deserved. After a dodgy start to the game I felt we dominated the second half. After Dean Ashton’s free kick which Howard somehow kept out with his leg at the end of the first half, we never really looked back. Defensively we look reasonably solid. The Setanata commentator blamed James Tomkins for the Everton goal, which I felt was a bit harsh. Whatever the truth of it, Tomkins kept his composure for the rest of the game and nearly scored with a header which bounded back off the bar fairly early on.

Interestingly, Mark Noble was very quiet during the first half and lost possession quite a lot. When he started playing, so did the whole team. Dean Ashton is looking sharper and sharper and his goal was sublime. There seemed no way he could score from that position, but for the second game in a row, he did. He should be told by Curbishley that he will play in each game until the end of the season. And Freddie Sears should play along side him as well. I can see a potentially lethal partnership being formed there.

Oh, I haven’t mentioned Boa Morte yet, have I? No, thought not. Best to leave it there. Even the commentator said he thought he couldn’t be arsed.

Green 8
Ferdinand 7
Tomkins 7
McCartney 7
Neill 7
Parker 7
Noble 7
Mullins 6
Boa Morte 5
Ashton 8
Ljungberg 7
Sears 8

3 x 4-0 = The Sack?

Three matches ago we had the best defensive record in the league outside the top 4. Three successive 4-0 defeats is a record no team can be proud of. To lose 4-0 to a team 8 points below us is shameful. Today we read in a Sunday newspaper that the club will replace Alan Curbishley at the end of the season. There will no doubt be cries for that to happen now after this result. But let’s not forget what he achieved last season for us. Surely to God he can turn things round now. The players at his disposal are overall far superior in quality to those who won the last seven games last year. I reckon a riot act needs reading.

But when you drop your best player to the bench (Noble) and persist with the waste of space that calls himself Luis Boa Morte you can hardly blame people if they questions your judgement, can you?

Anyway, I wasn’t there and didn’t see the match. I’m told we attacked much better, but our defence played as if they had never met each other before. What did people think, who actually saw the game?

Chelsea Afterthoughts

I really thought we could get something from this game. It shows how wrong you can be. Three soft goals in five minutes and it was all over. Up to then we had been at the races, although never really threatening. I suppose can all be self indulgent and look back at the Lampard sending off as being worth a heavy defeat, but we all know in our heads that such thoughts are madness. Three points would have put us among the European contenders. We’re now dropping a little behind, although it is comforting to see that we are 8 points clear of the eleventh place club, Tottenham.

So what went wrong against Chelsea? Simple. The first three goals. We were never going to come back from that, although it would have been nice to get a consolation goal. I was praying Dean Ashton could have grabbed one when he came on as a sub for the totally ineffective Luis Boa Morte. It wasn’t to be, although I did think Ashton looked a lot sharper than he has seemed recently. I think it’s now the time to give him a run of games. He needs his confidence back for next season and the only way that is going to happen is for him to play regularly. Yet again Carlton Cole was our best player. It’s a shame he just can’t put away a few more goals as his build up play and holding up of the ball are increasingly superb. Hem was very unlucky not to score yesterday.

The midfield were disappointing yesterday and failed to impose themselves. Faubert in particular did little to impress, and looked knackered in the middle of the second half. Ljungberg had a few good runs but that was it. Mark Noble has his weakest game for some time and his distribution was very poor. Mullins went on a few good runs, but that was it. In defence, apart from the goals (!) they seemed quite strong, but you just cannot give away goals like that. The Joe Cole goal was especially unforgiveable.

Was it a penalty? I didn’t think so. I thought the ball was almost out of play before the Chelsea player went down, but I was a long way away from it. Everyone around me felt it was cast iron penalty.

It was good to see Bobby Z get a few minutes. He didn’t really do anything but it would have done him the world of good.

Green 6
Ferdinand 6
Upson 7
McCartney 6
Neill 6
Faubert 5
Mullins 6
Noble 5
Ljungberg 7
Cole 8
Boa Morte 4

I think we just have to put this down as a bad day at the office and move on to think about the Liverpool game on Wednesday. I’d ring a few changes and play 4-5-1, bringing in Nobby Solano in place of Julien Faubert and Lee Bowyer (is he fit?) to play with Mullins and Noble in central midfield.

Liverpool Match Report

That will teach me to leave two minutes before the end! Apologies this is a bit delayed. Am at Heathrow Airport on my way to Washington for ten days. In my innocence I assumed there would be computers available but every single one is out of order. Typical BAA. Anyway, I digress.

The first half yesterday was dominated by a West Ham team who were clearly up for it. Three times the ball failed to drop for us in the penalty area and I don’t think we had a shot, but more importantly neither did they. Defensively we were again awesome. Some of Upson’s play was spellbindingan although one wayward backpass which went for a corner had my heart in my mouth.

Anton and George were, as usual, also on form and I thought Lucas Neill had his best game for a long time. He got caught out of position a couple of times but Gerrard didn’t take advantage.

Talking of Gerrard, it comes to something when he is eclipsed but Mark Noble owned him last night. I know some people on this blog reckon I overrate him but after that performance surely even they can see his quality. He was absolutely everywhere. Indeed the middle three all performed well. Hayden Mullins looks so confident now. Our first half performance was in large part down to the success of Noble, Mullins and Bowyer dominating the central areas.

When I saw we were going to play 4-5-1 at home my heart sank. It’s not the West Ham way. However, it seems to bring out the best in these players, especially Carlton Cole, who, again, was a revelation. He held the ball up superbly and seemed to win everything in the air.

There are three contenders for Man of the Match – Nobes, Upson and Cole. I’ll go (surprise, surprise!) for Mark Noble.

I’m afraid the broken record is about to be played again, but I do have to mention the perforamnce of Luis Boa Morte, who was appalling. After missing two chances he just seemed to give up. He persistently lost the ball and was, well, just crap. And the way he loped off the pitch, wasting valuable time was a disgrace. There are still 12 hours left in the transfer window to flog him, but let’s face it, who would want him in this form.

It has to be said that when he went off and was replaced by Matty, not a lot changed. Ashton came on too and we reverted to 4-4-2.

A final word about Freddie Ljungberg. Another great performance. I may have to eat my words on him…

All in all, just what I needed before an eight hour flight.

And don’t worry, I’ll still be posting every day while I am away.

Green 8
Upson 9
McCartney 8
Ferdinand 8
Neill 7
Bowyer 7
Noble 9
Mullins 8
Boa Morte 4
Ljungberg 8
Cole 9
Etherington 6
Ashton 6

Manchester City: Let’s Look at the Positives

Well if ever there was a game we deserved to win and didn’t it was this one. Let’s concentrate on the positives. We played the team with the best home record in the division and we should have won. The defence was again magnificent. The central midfield worked well. Carlton Cole scored a cracker of a goal. Julien Faubert showed some great touches when he came on. There were only two negatives to the game – the referee and Luis Boa Morte. I know people think I have a thing about him and they’re right. Today you could see why. He was a liability. If Matty Etherington had been fit I reckon we’d have won. I also want to pay tribute to Hayden Mullins and Mark Noble, both of whom were immense. Noble nearly snatched it towards the end and perhaps should have, but let’s not ignore their goalkeeper, Joe Hart, who saved them time and again.

We now have one thing to play for: Europe. I really believe that we are now showing the kind of defensive consistency which achieves results. We have a central midfield which looks strong, and if we can only get our wing play and strikers sorted out I believe we can finish in the top 7.

And finally another big up for Carlton Cole. This boy has come on leaps and bounds. He’ll never be perfect, but in game after game he’s working his socks off, something most of us probably never thought we would see. His first touch is getting better and his shielding of the ball is now excellent. He’s going to give the manager a real headache when Ashton and Bellamy are both fit, not to mention Bobby Z.

Green 8
Upson 8
Ferdinand 8.5
McCartney 7
Neill 7
Mullins 8
Noble 8
Ljungberg 7.5
Boa Morte 5
Cole 8
Bowyer 7

Will We Ever Beat Man City?

There was a time when I used to look forward to playing Manchester City because we’d invariably beat them. We should have beaten them last night but contrived not to take our chances. It was not a good game. Indeed, it was tedious that I took refuge in my laptop for large parts of it.

For me there was no outstanding performance. No one excelled, and it’s for that reason we didn’t win. Noone took the game by the scruff of its neck. Dean Ashton was back out of firm. His first touch seems to have deserted him. And don’t get me started on the inadequacies of Luis Boa Morte. You couldn’t fault his effort but there was never any end result.

And is it just me, or has Robert Green’s form dipped in the last few games? I know I have just said the unthinkable, but he has looked just a little bit ‘flappy’ on occasions recently.

The team must make amends on Sunday. A repeat performance will not be good enough. If we aspire to a top eight finish we should expect at least a point out of the game.

Man U Match Report: Proud to be a Hammer

Somehow it was just meant to be. I purposely got to the stadium early to soak up the earlt atmosphere. It’s easy for me to say now, but as I sat down I felt it might be our day. I didn’t say it to anyone for fear of jinxing us.

The reception for Carlos Tevez was astonishing. I suspect I wasn’t alone in having a tear in my eye. The whole crowd rose as one and sang ‘One Carlos Tevez’.

At first sight the team selection looked odd, with Deano being dropped to the bench. But with five across midfield Man U just couldn’t cope.

From the word go we got stuck in and harried them.Parker, Mullins and Noble were not just putting in some tough tackles but being creative too.

Our play in the first twenty minutes made us look like the top four team, rather than Man U. We should have scored when Mullins hit the crossbar and Noble hit the ball over the bar with the follow up. A few minutes later Man U broke down the left and Ronaldo scored with a powerful header. Previous West Ham teams might have folded there and then but not this one. For the rest of the half we played well, dug in and created chances. Carlton Cole held up the ball superbly and Nobby was inventive down the right. We also had two good penalty shouts.

The second half saw Man U come into the game more and when they were awarded a penalty after a Spector handball it seemed it might well be Game Over. Not so. Robert Green seemed to put Ronaldo off and he skewed the ball wide. That was the turning point. I screamed at Curbishley to put on Deano and take off Ljungberg. He duly obliged and I turned to my mate and said ‘we’re going to win this’. He didn’t look convinced!

Meanwhile Anton had replaced the injured Scott Parker and John Pantsil came on for Nobby, who also was injured.

Anton didn’t look rusty at all and made some telling headers before popping up at a Mark Noble set piece to grab the equaliser. And theb, what do you know but Matthew Upson headed a winner seven minutes from time from another Mark Noble free kick special. We went delirious.

John Pantsil was tremendous in the last ten minutes, tackling, harrying, running the ball to the corner flag. At last he’s been given the chance to show what he can do.

So a fabulous day and by far the best home performance of the season.

Now, can anyone name me the last club to beat Man U in three successive league meetings? No? Thought not!

29 points, eh? Woo hoo!!

Green 9 Awesome
McCartney 9 Brilliant
Upson 9 Stupendous
Spector 8 Great
Neill 7 Untroubled
Noble 8 Back to his best
Mullins 8 Powerful
Parker 8 Midfield general
Solano 9 Inventive
Cole 9 Man of the Match
Ljungberg 6 The only average performance
Pantsil 8 Supersub
Ashton 8 Held ball up well
Ferdinand 8 Super goal!

PS Tevez also played apparently!

Reading Afterthoughts

Well that really was two points lost. Unforgiveably so. This was a lacklustre showing against ten men who we should have wiped off the park. The truth is that they showed the spirit we lacked. I can’t think of a single move which deserved the accolade of being made by West Ham United. Our defence was strong, but we created little on the wings and too often lost out in midfield. Cole and Ashton were well off the pace and Camara was even worse when he came on as a sub for Cole. What’s the betting we now go and beat Man U?!

Green 7
Upson 7
Spector 7
McCartney 7
Neill 7
Mullins 6
Parker 7
Ljungberg 5
Solano 7
Cole 5
Ashton 5

Ljungberg is way past his best, and he may be many things, but a left winger he ain’t.

Everton (non) Match report

I couldn’t go to the game today. I could tell you why, but I’d have to shoot you. So, tell me how terrible it was…

Blackburn Match Report

The great thing about this performance was not the win, it was the consistency. The team have performed with the same dogged determination now for several games. It may not be pretty at times, but it’s effective. When was the last time we had a plus 8 goal difference? When was the last time we had won four games away at this stage of the season? We should remind ourselves that we have only let in 12 goals so far this season. At the same stage last season it was 18. After 15 games last season we had 14 points. We now have 22. We had scored 10 goals last season compared to 20 this season. All in all, we should be really proud of what this team has achieved. Imagine what might have happened if all the injured players had been available.

There were no weak links today. Everyone gave their all. I thought Dean Ashton was outstanding in the second half. Mullins and Parker ruled midfield and the back four coordinated really well. Lucas Neill had a few dodgy moments, possibly, but I’m nitpicking. Boa Morte could have had a couple of goals and he seems a different player to the one I criticised so freely earlier in the season.

And Robert Green. Well, his save from Tugay in the last few minutes said it all. The man is pure class.

Green 9 – Three world class saves
McCartney – 8 Apart from a miskick, dealt with everything that came to him
Neill – 7 Drove the team on
Upson – 8 Kept both Blackburn strikers in his pocket
Gabbidon – 8 Ditto
Mullins – 8 He’s transformed himself this season
Parker – 9 He’s going to be a massive player for us. A real leader.
Solano – 8 A joy to watch
Cole – 7 Few chances but gave his all
Boa Morte – 8 Brilliant volley should have led to a goal
Etherington – 6 Not really on song and picked up an injury
Ashton 9 – Back on song. Imagine what he will be like by Christmas

So as I say, the fourth match in a row where the team has put in a consistent performance full of vim and vigour. Bring on Everton!

Chelsea Afterthoughts: Proud to be a Hammer

I am sure I am not alone when I say how proud I was of our performance against Chelsea. We deserved at least a point, and defensively we were awesome. It givesd me real hope for the future if we continue to play with that level of total commitment and skill. We were never going to have a huge number of goalscoring opportunities, and so it proved, but again, Carlton Cole worked his dogs bits off and Luis Boa Morte had his best game in a Hammers shirt. Scott Parker was terrific in midfield, with Upson the star of a superb back four. I really cannot praise them too highly. Let’s hope this kind of form is carried forward into the two Everton matches and beyond.

Green 8 Consistent as ever
Upson 9 Man of the match
Gabbison 8 Didn’t give Drogba a sniff
McCartney 7 Solid
Neill 7 Improving with every game
Solana 7 Pity about the missed header
Mullins 8 Linked well with Parker
Parker 8 Great tough tackles
Etherington 6 Had a difficult day
Cole 8 Total commitment
Boa Morte 8 Harried and tackled like a demon

Oh What Fun it is to See West Ham Win Away

5-0! Can you believe that!!!??? With THAT team???!!! Just imagine if we had Bellamy and Ashton back? Let’s give credit to Lee Bowyer. He took his chances and was on a hattrick. You can’t ask for more than that. I listened to the radio commentary but it was difficult to work out who the real stars were. Gutted for George McCartney. Hope it isn’t too serious.

So, if you were there, tell us more!!

Sunderland Match Report

What an odd game. We looked great in parts and awful in others. I thought some of our passing in the first half was excellent, but the one goal lead never looked enough. Sunderland are not a pretty team, but are effective in stopping others playing. Their centre forward Kenwe Jones gave Upson a hell of a roasting for the whole game.

In some ways you’d have to admit that a 3-1 win did not reflect the ebb and flow of the game. As Kieron Dyer said on SKY, many of us may have settled for a draw after 60 minutes.

It was the substitution which changed things. I had to laugh when the crowd chanted : “you don’t know what you’re doing”. A minute later we scored. Maybe the crowd should have then chanted: “we don’t know what we’re saying”! Mind you, quite what Curbishley thought he ws doing subbing Noble is anyone’e guess.

George McCartney had a stormer today. I thought he was head and shoulders above anyone else. Carlton Cole also did well. As I said in the previous piece, it was an important game for him today and he came through it well. Bowyer has a good first half and Bellamy was all over the pitch. And Robert Green. well, what can one say? His save from Leadbitter was the turning point. If that had gone in, that would have been curtains.

Green 8 Superb
Gabbidon 6 Steady
Upson 4 Jones had him
McCartney 9 Awesome
Neill 6 Anonymous
Noble 7 A couple of bad passes but gave his all
Mullins 6 Average
Bowyer 7 Good first half
Cole 7 Good in the air. Great goal
Bellamy 8 Buzzing